By Tony Mitch

I was home alone one night when Missy, an old friend, called and asked if I wanted to have sex. It'd been a year since I'd had sex, and I was still angst-ridden about my ex-girlfriend. I'd become terribly lonely in that time (drinking, getting high, watching porn, etc.).

Missy's situation was different. She'd just been dumped, and this was to be a revenge fuck.

She came over to my apartment, a tiny Pentecostal church renovated into a studio, with slanted floors. I lit a few candles and sat on the futon next to her. A few of my porn videos were sitting on top of the TV.

"Don't go so fast, slow down," she said as I unbuttoned her shirt.

It was hard to slow down. I just wanted to be inside her as soon as possible.

"You know about my issues with sex," she said. Missy had years of therapy. She spoke in a language I didn't quite understand.

"I know. It's hard for you to get close," I said calmly, almost in a whisper.

Her big issue was that she had been raped. She never detailed it for me. In all honesty, I felt like she'd been exaggerating a bad experience. But I didn't know the truth. Still, I had always been a bit condescending to her about it.

"Let's take this off," I said, pulling her shirt over her head. I stood up and opened the futon. It felt clinical. Like I was about to give her an exam.

She lay down, bra and jeans still on. She had jet-black hair, pale skin. Her breasts were enormous. I unsnapped the bra.

I was so thrilled to have my mouth around her nipples that I had trouble enjoying the moment. I could cry, I was so grateful.

After a bit of nuzzling her chest, I buried my face in her pussy. I must have licked her for a good 10 minutes before she grabbed my head and pulled me away; she then jammed her tongue in my mouth and started kissing me while unzipping my fly. She dropped her head down and started sucking my cock.

When I'd gotten good and hard, I started thinking about where I'd put the condoms. Immediately my cock became limp. Frustrated, I started tugging. It was embarrassing but it was all I could do to get hard again. No matter what, I was determined, this condom was going on this dick and the whole package was going into Missy.

I became angry. I felt I could throw a punch.

To ensure that I stayed hard, I stuffed my cock inside her as quick as possible.

"Go slower," she said.

My thought was: Fuck you, bitch.

Then she let out a bit of a whimper that made me want to fuck her all the more. What she didn't know was that I would've slowed down if I wasn't so worried about losing my hard-on. The latex condoms rendered me practically senseless. Fortunately, I'd gotten inside Missy quick enough to pound away. In my effort to stay hard, I'd pounded her right off the bed.

I loved it. It'd been months of watching porn and jerking off. I was going to fuck the hell out of this one. She turned instantly into a piece of flesh. I became barbaric, vicious.

Before I knew it, we were on the floor, fucking. I could feel the rug burn my knees.

After a little while, I remembered the woman in the picture, looked up, and said, "Are you all right?"

"Yeah, can you go slower?"

"Sure," I said.

I slid out, lifted her by the buttocks and dropped her back on the bed. Then I stood up, lifted her legs up and slid back inside of her. Her knees were pressed against her tits, and I slid in and out with great deliberateness. I pulled harder on her hair then I thought. The rage returned. I wanted to fucking strangle her.

Then I pulled out. I hadn't come.Ê

I slid off the condom and lay panting beside her. After the rage subsided, I asked her to stroke it for me. She did. I said, "Did you come?"

"No."

I reached for her pussy. "No," she said.

"What? I'll make you come."

"I never come."

"What?"

"I've never had an orgasm."

"I can't believe it. Why didn't you ever tell me that?"

She giggled. "Not something you say."

I thought: Later, later I'll be compassionate. Right now I have to come. I asked her to keep stroking. After all, it would be a shame if both of us didn't come. But she lost interest in my dick. She seemed to have left the room emotionally.

I pleaded quietly, and then the rage came back. I climbed on top of her. "I feel like I could just rape you."

I couldn't believe the word actually came out of my mouth, but she heard it loud and clear.

"What did you say?"

"Sorry," I said. "I didn't mean that. I just am so…well, I'm dying here," pointing at my cock.

"I'm going home," she said.

"You're not going home. Just take it easy."

"I can't believe you said that."

"I'm sorry. It just came out. Look, it's me, your old friend. I care about you."

I continued pleading while she sat there, arms crossed.

Then we lay awake in silence. Two people frustrated beyond belief. She fell asleep before me. I hoped we might have angry morning sex.

In the morning, she woke up, dressed quickly and left.

After she was gone, I popped in a porn video and masturbated. But I felt foolish, sitting there jerking off. I ended up coming, but it was like spitting out mouthwash. I sat there alone, dejected and with sperm on my stomach, watching two strangers fuck wildly on my TV screen. n

kevin69@earthlink.net