What's better than someone babbling to their dog in a stupid voice as if it was a human being? How about a room full of people doing it all at once? Every Thursday this summer, the Downtown Doghouse is hosting its Weekly Pet Parties. Themes include “Pomeranian Pow-Wow,” “Shih Tzu Shindig” and “Pets & the Paranormal: Psychics, Tarot and Paw Reading.” This Thursday: “Curly Coats Convention.” Expect a lot of people to spend the night projecting their own emotions and insecurities onto their dogs, and a lot of dogs just wandering around sniffing things. If nothing else, the humans will be able to walk away from the evening comforted in the knowledge that they're not alone in owning a sissy dog. The important thing is events like this keep these people indoors and off the streets where they can't bother normal people. (Steven McCauley)

June 22. Downtown Doghouse, 259 W. 18th St. (betw. 7th & 8th Aves.), 212-924-5300; 6, free.