By Doug Black

The city’s men-in-uniform had a tough week. On Saturday, William Scott savagely attacked 78-year-old Carmine Randazzo, who was on a noontime stroll through his Queens neighborhood. The attack was unprovoked, and ended with Scott stabbing the elderly man to death before fleeing the scene. The tragic irony of the incident is that Randazzo was the father of three New York City police officers, who protect against the same brand of wanton brutality on a daily basis. When the police arrived, they quickly found and arrested Scott, who cited the voices in his head as the impetus for the attack. To absolutely nobody’s surprise, officials claim Scott is mentally ill.

Three brothers—each with considerable criminal records—showed similarly terrible judgment in the random and brutal beating of Richard Berkhout, a NYC fireman. The trio of ex-cons sped down a Mastic Beach neighborhood only hours after one was released from a four-year prison sentence for assault. Berkhout verbally chastised the driver’s carelessness, prompting the brothers to allegedly exit the car and attack him, fracturing his skull and inflicting myriad other injuries. Berkhout’s wily spouse ran off with the their car keys, effectively immobilizing the perpetrators and ensuring their arrest. To add insult to life-threatening injury, the fireman and his wife were returning home from a 9/11 memorial ceremony on the attack’s fifth anniversary. As a result, hundreds of New York’s bravest planned to descend on the Suffolk County courthouse in an apparent attempt to show their support for Berkhout and scare the living crap out of the pugnacious brothers.