By About Town

Thursday, November 29

(PARTY)
Another Long Weekend
You’re still trying to wash off all that wholesome family goodness? This Thursday doesn’t involve fowl play, just dancing. 432 Promotions presents its monthly dance event, The Long Weekend, complete with cheap drinks and music from DJ OP! and DJ Knomad. Uncle Mings, 225 Avenue B, 2nd Fl. (betw. 13th & 14th Sts.), 212-979-8506; 9, free.

(DANCE)
Cracked Nuts
If you go to see dance because of the half-naked performers and amazing agility, rather than for the snooty snoot factor , then Nutcracker: Rated R is what you’ve been looking for. Returning for its second year, the raunchy take on the holiday classic  is set during a 1980s punk/new wave scene and includes plenty of garish eye makeup, mesh tops and experimentations with coke. Last year’s dueling dildo scene was one for the storybooks—just make sure to leave the tykes at home. You’ll want to enjoy this one without having to cover anyone’s eyes (or ears). Begins today, runs through Dec. 23. Theater for the New City, 155 1st Ave. (betw. 9th & 10th Sts.), 212-254-1109; Thurs.-Saturday 8; Sun. 3, $10-$15.

(COMICS)
Hands-On Porno Handbook
Haven’t been getting your quirky comic book fix lately? Well the folks at Rabid Rabbit (including our own illustrator, Paul Hoppe) will change that with the release of their latest edition: “Rabid Rabbit’s Unabridged Hands-on Handbook to Recognizing and Evaluating the Fallacious and Scrupulous Traits of PORNOGRAPHY—A Users Manual!” Join the artists who dare to defy boundaries of the lewd and the lascivious, who flirt with taboo and titillation, as they commemorate the culmination of their most spectacular collaboration! And so as not to disappoint: Yes, there will be cake! Beauty Bar backroom, 231 E. 14th St. (betw. 2nd & 3rd Aves.), www.rabidrabbit.org ; 7-10, free.

Friday, November 30

(FILM)
Fathering a Continent’s Cinema
If African cinema is a major gap in your knowledge of film history, this is the perfect occasion to start learning from the beginning. It’s commonly agreed that Senegalese director Ousmane Sembene, who passed away this summer, was the first African filmmaker. In light of his death, Film Forum and New Yorker Films have organized Sembene, a retrospective running from today to December 13 and screening all nine of his feature films and one short. Sembene was a successful novelist who turned director at age forty, recognizing the latter medium’s capacity to reach a much larger audience in Africa. His films focus a critical lens on everything from European colonialism and its lasting effects, corruption and sexism in liberated African societies and the inability of tribal traditions to cope with modern problems, amongst many other loaded topics that earned Sembene frequent censoring both in Europe and Africa. Film Forum, 209 W. Houston St. (Betw. 6th Ave. & Varick St.), 212-727-8110, filmforum.org.

(BURLESQUE)
Cornucopia of Jiggles
Nasty Canasta and Jonny Porkpie don’t think the usual November celebrations are sexy enough. So to combat the usual Puritanical bent of the holiday season, the Burlesque Alliance presents Novemberfest: A Night of Song, Snakedance and Sexiness. Other than Maiiah’s unusual snake dance, be prepared to judge the competition for the eventual crowning of the first-ever SixPoint Beer Queen, “Miss Sweet Action.” It’ll make you forget all about those pesky Pilgrims. Southpaw, 125 5th Ave. (betw. Sterling & St. John’s Pls.), B’klyn, 718-230-0236; 9, $15

Saturday, December 1

(FESTIVAL)
Get Your Book On
Getting to the bottom of your reading list? Looking for impressive and obscure Christmas gifts for friends who have everything? Solutions to these problems abound at the 20th edition of the Independent & Small Press Book Fair, taking place in Midtown this weekend (10 to 6 on Saturday, 11 to 5 on Sunday). With more than 100 presses from throughout the U.S. and the world, and a rich slate of events—including readings and Q & As with celebrated authors and publishers, a panel on writing and publishing erotic fiction, another on translation etiquette and a literary trivia quiz—you’ll be overwhelmed by how quickly you feel like a dilettante. If nothing else, pick up some goodies and hang out with a few books at the fair’s Literary Café, open throughout the event. New York Center for Independent Publishing, 20 W. 44th St. (betw. 5th & 6th Aves.), 212-764-7021; nycip.org.

(ART)
A Night at the (New) Museum
It’s not a Disney movie and Ben Stiller probably won’t be there, but this might be the most important opening night of the season. Target 30 Free Hours at the New Museum welcomes New Yorkers to the opening of the first museum to be built in downtown Manhattan. Starting today at noon and running through the night until 6pm on Sunday, attendance is free – though tickets should be secured in advance via the New Museum website. Be among the first to see the museum’s stunning new building and Unmonumental, its opening exhibition of contemporary sculptures from around the globe, as well as other new artworks and installations commissioned by the museum. The New Museum, 235 Bowery (at Prince St.), 212-219-1222, newmuseum.org; Sat. Noon-Sun. 6pm, free.

(DRAWING)
Catch the Gingerbread Man
If you’re a still-life snob, forget Michael Alan’s Draw-A-Thon. But if you’re up for a bit of bizarro performance for your sketching pleasure, then this latest concept—female models chase the Gingerbread Man and eat him—may just be one of the strangest uses of naked ladies in the service of “art” that we’ve seen in quite a while. Teatro IATI, 64 E. 4th St. (betw. 2nd Ave. & Bowery), michaelalanart.com; 4pm-1am, $15-$20.

Sunday, December 2

(SPORT)
Girls in Bikinis
If you feel you may have a little more to jiggle post-Thanksgiving, then take it to the jello mat! The gals who run Amateur Female Jello Wrestling, take their “satire sport” back to Arelene’s Grocery, with musical guests EvenEye, Vesper, and DJ Xerox. Arlene’s Grocery, 95 Stanton St. (betw. Orchard & Ludlow Sts.), 212-995-1652; 8, $5-$20 (Ladies wishing to wrestle: RSVP to danasterling@gmail.com, and show up at 6:30pm for the mandatory, free wrestle lesson).

Monday, December 3

(LECTURE & FILM)
Commemorating A Controversialist
The Italian Cultural Institue, Fondazione Aida and the Film Society of Lincoln Center continue to celebrate the life of the infamous filmmaker and artist, Pier Paolo Pasolini. Today Vincenzo Cerami gives a masterclass titled “The Tale of Reality.” But earlier in the day you can check out The Gospel According to St. Matthew at Lincoln Center (2pm) and end the evening with a screening of Pasolini’s most famous work, Salò (8pm). It’s enough to make you feel a little dirty. Masterclass at CUNY Grad Center, Skylight room, 365 5th Ave. (betw. 34th & 35th Sts.), pasolininewyork.com; 6:30, free; Screenings at Walter Reade Theater, 70 Lincoln Center Plaza, 212 875 5600; $7-$11.

(LIT EVENT)
Sound Workings
Rick Moody can be unbearable to watch and listen to on his own (only so many self-satisfied smirks we can handle), but perhaps he’ll be toned down during this evening of “sound work” with the poet Thalia Field and audio artist Laura Vitale. Four pieces will run consecutively, followed by a Q & A with the artists. Poetry Project, St. Mark’s Church in-the-Bowery, 131 E. 10th St. (at 2nd Ave.), 212-674-0910; 8, $5-$8.

Tuesday, December 4

(STORYTELLING)
Tell a Story
Sherry Weaver has herded another batch of guys and gals who like to tell you their life stories during her regular SpeakEasy: Stories From the Back Room series. Featuring Mike Daisey, Jean Michele Gregory, Andy Christie, Tracy Rowland, Greg Walloch and Michele Carlo, it’s sure to be a chance to hear some secrets, learn some new vocab words and even have a laugh or two at someone else’s expense. Who needs comedy when you have salacious stories? Cornelia Street Café, 29 Cornelia St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves. by W. 4th St.), 212-989-9319; 8:30, $10 + food or drink min.

Wednesday, December 5

(CABARET)
HECKUVA HANUKKAH
Already bored on the second night of Hanukkah? The 14th Street Y has organized a cure for your conundrum: the Menorah Horah Hanukkah cabaret. Come revel in this campy celebration featuring burlesque by the Schlep Sisters and Trixie Minx from New Orleans, sultry cabaret crooners Allison Tilsen and Raven Snook. Mr. and Mrs. JewS.A. 2007/5768 will also be in attendance and leading the way on the dance floor. If this sounds like too much Hanukkah fun, don’t worry: There will also be latkes to eat, a menorah to light and a Dreidel Spin Off to dominate. Slipper Room, 167 Orchard St. (at Stanton St.), 212-253-7246, 14streety.org; 9:30, $5.