MAILBOX

This week: Another I Am Legend fan wants Armond White fired; Emma Span’s take on ‘quarterlife’ finds another ‘Degrassi Junior High’ fan; no love for the boy at the gallery party; and as the WGA strike continues, a scab volunteers.

Armond White is Dumb
Armond White doesn’t do his research. He should be fired. [His review of I Am Legend] is definitely the worst movie review I have ever read (“The Invincible Man,” Dec. 12-18). It’s not bad because I disagree with his opinion on the movie—in fact, there is hardly any opinion presented on the film. For this, and because the research behind the article is atrocious, the review is the worst I have ever read.
Nearly the entire “review” is dedicated to pointing out the fact that Will Smith is a black man. Was Will Smith cast in this big-budget vampire flick to make any social commentary? Or was he cast because the man is a blockbuster machine? Armond White will find racial commentary wherever he looks.
He mentions that Will Smith recites the lines of Donkey, the Shrek character voiced by Eddie Murphy, and alludes to them being “kin” in Hollywood. If Armond White had paid attention, he would have noticed that he recited the lines of both Donkey and Shrek (the latter being voiced by the very white Mike Myers). The point of that scene has nothing to do with blacks in Hollywood: It’s supposed to illustrate how long he’s been alone, how much time he has had with nothing to do.
White’s review has almost nothing to do with the movie. He doesn’t critique the movie as much as he does chronicle Will Smith’s career and retroactively place racial commentary into movies where there is none (Shark Tales? Really?). Armond White’s review is dumb, he is dumb, and he should feel dumb.
—Patrick Plovanich, Chicago, IL

Give Me Degrassi
I agree with Emma Span, (“emptysomething,” Dec. 19-25) if I wanted another “Degrassi Junior High” rip-off, I would’ve bought the DVDs of “Degrassi Junior High.”
—Higgs

Shut Up, Whiny Rich Boy
After reading Royal Young’s poorly written account of how he wastes his life (“A Christmas Ornament for the Rich, Dec. 12-18), I couldn’t help but refer to the subtitle of his piece, “Rubbing shoulders at the Robert Miller Gallery Christmas Party is a job in itself,” and question whether the party he attended was any kind of job at all. Since his words appear in your paper, I have to accept the fact that Mr. Young is indeed a writer, as his pithy MySpace page suggests. What I have trouble accepting is a paper that would publish such an irreducibly pathetic “story,” which so penitently caters to the absurdly inflated art society of NYC, as well as Mr. Young’s unquestionable status as a coddled white boy from Manhattan. Perhaps he was taking a stab at this era’s holy irony. Forgive me if I’ve missed the gist. Wait, don’t forgive me; it still reads like Vice’s best material, otherwise known as shit. Thanks for nothing.
—Aaron Gettler

VOLUNTEERING TO SCAB
I read your story, “Meet the Scabs,” (Nov. 14-20) and, as a writer—fortunately, not a TV writer—I have an opinion. I would never join the WGA. What kind of organization vows to hunt down willing people who want to break into TV? It is a hard life, and those writers should be damn glad they get paid at all. With so many people willing to step in their places, I would just thank god every day I get paid. Don’t like the money your show is making? Then write a little less better (sic). The networks would get the hint. Hold back your best for your own endeavors—‘cause you know all them writers have a novel going. But to have some rep from the WGA tell me they would hunt me down and make sure I never worked again? That’s the definition of abuse of power... Makes me want to get on a plane and scab.
—Kristine Kalish