The Hotties and the Nottie
Directed by Tom Putnam
Fool's Gold
Directed by Andy Tennant
Sometimes it’s the title, and sometimes the star—but in the case of The Hottie and the Nottie, both affect the perception of the movie as a zestfully lightheaded affair. The marketing gods haven’t lied to you, but they have fudged some of the details.
Paris Hilton plays the same brainless set of curves that her media-saturated persona implies, but the doltish image nearly works in the context of this acutely slight romantic comedy. I wouldn’t say it’s particularly good, but certain measured elements of the genre create something surprisingly passable.
The Hottie and the Nottie (from now on referred to as THAN) excels at fulfilling a recent trend in studio-manufactured comedies: Introduce a highly preposterous rule to the mating game, and slovenly hurl it against the best efforts of the story’s main heterosexual male. In the horrendous Good Luck Chuck, countless women eagerly screw the goofball hero after word gets out that his conjugal visits guarantee future trysts with other lovers will result in lifelong satisfaction. Conflict arises when he can’t bed the girl he desires for fear that she’ll find somebody else.
THAN has a comparatively scientific twist to its governing logic. Dopey beach bum Nate (Joel David Moore) has struggled with a lingering crush for his old elementary schoolmate Cristabel (Hilton) and decides he can’t deal with any alternatives. But even as Cristabel takes an immediate liking to Nate’s sloppy moves, she won’t commit until her hideously ugly friend June (the not-hideously-ugly Christine Larkin, buried in grotesque makeup and fake hair) finds her own paramour. Nate’s inexplicably knowledgeable pal sums it up: To screw the hottie, first find a partner for the universally unattractive nottie.
While the simplicity of this plain logic has the annoying monotony of a schoolyard rhyme, its brainless trajectory reflects the object of Nate’s attraction, ultimately justifying his altered attraction in the movie’s intriguing final third. It’s not clear whether the tone orchestrated by director Thomas Putnam intends to mock—and, eventually, correct—the superficial allures of the Hilton character, but the result is a somewhat satisfying magnification of the dumb-blond paradox. No less than Werner Herzog has expressed fascination with the lasting impression of Anna Nicole Smith, and Hilton carries a similarly brash appeal for the dissonance of her apparent social power and anti-intellectualism. THAN doesn’t rectify the problem, but it offers a fairly promising method for taming the beast: Avert your eyes.
The bland classical narrative of the week isn’t the Paris Hilton vehicle, but whether that’s an inspiring or merely quizzical development for our culture remains indeterminable. Fool’s Gold, an unfunny and overlong sea romp, pits Matthew McConaughey against Kate Hudson in an amorous battle of wits, but nobody wins. Ben (McConaughey) incessantly chases hidden treasure in the Caribbean; Tess (Hudson) is his estranged partner. In between annoying verbal spars, they make great strides in a search for ancient booty. Combining wannabe quirky nautical humor with standard adventure tropes, Fool’s Gold suggests The Life Aquatic colliding with Romancing the Stone, but the total experience yields a far shallower result.
Where The Hottie and the Nottie lingers on a mismatched relationship, Fool’s Gold relies on the predictable twists of a remarriage comedy. Since McConaughey and Hudson don’t portray exceedingly original personalities, the illusion of a fresh story falls apart, leaving the lackluster sight of misplaced movie stars grinning in the tropical sun. Talented when they have decent material, the actors are pretty-faced tools. Paris Hilton, however, hovers in an entirely separate arena. She’s a self-propagated mass-market brand, at once unclassifiable and a class to herself.
Directed by Tom Putnam
Fool's Gold
Directed by Andy Tennant
Sometimes it’s the title, and sometimes the star—but in the case of The Hottie and the Nottie, both affect the perception of the movie as a zestfully lightheaded affair. The marketing gods haven’t lied to you, but they have fudged some of the details.
Paris Hilton plays the same brainless set of curves that her media-saturated persona implies, but the doltish image nearly works in the context of this acutely slight romantic comedy. I wouldn’t say it’s particularly good, but certain measured elements of the genre create something surprisingly passable.
The Hottie and the Nottie (from now on referred to as THAN) excels at fulfilling a recent trend in studio-manufactured comedies: Introduce a highly preposterous rule to the mating game, and slovenly hurl it against the best efforts of the story’s main heterosexual male. In the horrendous Good Luck Chuck, countless women eagerly screw the goofball hero after word gets out that his conjugal visits guarantee future trysts with other lovers will result in lifelong satisfaction. Conflict arises when he can’t bed the girl he desires for fear that she’ll find somebody else.
THAN has a comparatively scientific twist to its governing logic. Dopey beach bum Nate (Joel David Moore) has struggled with a lingering crush for his old elementary schoolmate Cristabel (Hilton) and decides he can’t deal with any alternatives. But even as Cristabel takes an immediate liking to Nate’s sloppy moves, she won’t commit until her hideously ugly friend June (the not-hideously-ugly Christine Larkin, buried in grotesque makeup and fake hair) finds her own paramour. Nate’s inexplicably knowledgeable pal sums it up: To screw the hottie, first find a partner for the universally unattractive nottie.
While the simplicity of this plain logic has the annoying monotony of a schoolyard rhyme, its brainless trajectory reflects the object of Nate’s attraction, ultimately justifying his altered attraction in the movie’s intriguing final third. It’s not clear whether the tone orchestrated by director Thomas Putnam intends to mock—and, eventually, correct—the superficial allures of the Hilton character, but the result is a somewhat satisfying magnification of the dumb-blond paradox. No less than Werner Herzog has expressed fascination with the lasting impression of Anna Nicole Smith, and Hilton carries a similarly brash appeal for the dissonance of her apparent social power and anti-intellectualism. THAN doesn’t rectify the problem, but it offers a fairly promising method for taming the beast: Avert your eyes.
The bland classical narrative of the week isn’t the Paris Hilton vehicle, but whether that’s an inspiring or merely quizzical development for our culture remains indeterminable. Fool’s Gold, an unfunny and overlong sea romp, pits Matthew McConaughey against Kate Hudson in an amorous battle of wits, but nobody wins. Ben (McConaughey) incessantly chases hidden treasure in the Caribbean; Tess (Hudson) is his estranged partner. In between annoying verbal spars, they make great strides in a search for ancient booty. Combining wannabe quirky nautical humor with standard adventure tropes, Fool’s Gold suggests The Life Aquatic colliding with Romancing the Stone, but the total experience yields a far shallower result.
Where The Hottie and the Nottie lingers on a mismatched relationship, Fool’s Gold relies on the predictable twists of a remarriage comedy. Since McConaughey and Hudson don’t portray exceedingly original personalities, the illusion of a fresh story falls apart, leaving the lackluster sight of misplaced movie stars grinning in the tropical sun. Talented when they have decent material, the actors are pretty-faced tools. Paris Hilton, however, hovers in an entirely separate arena. She’s a self-propagated mass-market brand, at once unclassifiable and a class to herself.
