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A Room of Their Own

Leslie Kritzer and Doug Kreeger move into Rooms only to find it barren

Wednesday, March 25,2009
If Judy Garland and James Mason’s characters in the classic film A Star Is Born had gone into therapy, labeled their emotional problems (“This is Mrs. Norman Maine… and I’m an enabler”), they’d have been healthier, but they’d also be a bit dull and ordinary, drained of all drama and romanticism. Something along those lines happens to Monica and Ian in the new rock musical Rooms.

Nothing ever prevents either the ambitious Monica (Leslie Kritzer) or the apathetic Ian (Doug Kreeger) from attaining their happy ending, or being unrelentingly nice characters. See the two songwriters hit it big in 1977 London as punk duo The Diabolicals! Oh, but don’t be put off by their snarls and grimaces—both are just sweet kids putting on an act and secretly marveling at their good fortune. Oooh, Monica discovers that she’s pregnant in gritty ‘70s New York, and informs Ian that she intends to have an abortion! But in 2009, a storyline involving an abortion is unheard of, so naturally Monica doesn’t go through with the procedure. Uh-oh, Ian’s drinking a little too much now! Eh, nothing that can’t be solved via a song about getting sober with the help of Alcoholics Anonymous. After a while, rooting for either of them to succeed or survive becomes pointless when book writers Paul Scott Goodman (who also wrote the songs) and Miriam Goodman continually telegraph their determination, among all the rest of their storytelling clichés, for happy endings all around.

While watching two American actors navigate the difficulties of performing with a foreign accent (and in this case, sing in one, as well) is usually the fastest way to spend an uncomfortable evening at the theater, stars Kritzer and Kreeger deserve credit for making their Scottish burrs seem so natural. But those accents are the only things in Rooms that manage to feel authentic.

Early in Monica’s relationship with Ian, she informs him that her motto is W.I.T.: Whatever it takes. But after The Diabolicals disband (all that boozing and abortion talk took their toll on Monica and Ian’s relationship), she’s stuck doing a cabaret act at The Duplex—a fate she considers worse than death. Does she wow her audience with another metamorphosis, from punk rocker to chanteuse? Of course not. She condescends to the crowd and breaks down in the middle of her song. For someone who constantly references Carly Simon and whose songs reek of easy listening, Monica seems to have taken her cynical bid for stardom via punk rock a little too seriously to strike out on her own. “Whatever it takes” would not seem to include finding success without Ian, so they must both be miserable before they can be happy.

And though Kreeger gets a few hard-driving songs to convey Ian’s dissatisfaction with life and accelerated descent into alcoholism, his issues are even less convincing. Bordering on agoraphobic, he’s easily talked into exploring the world by Monica, first for a gig at a bat mitzvah, then a trip to London and finally New York. Ian’s drinking eventually leads to the show’s darkest songs, but it takes only a few verses before he’s kicked the bottle to wing his way back to NYC and Monica.

Some of Goodman’s score has the driving beat and insistent rhythm of rock at its best (standout numbers include Monica’s “I want” song “Whatever It Takes” and the evocative “NYC Forever!”); much of it gets the plot across with as little effort as possible. But neither Kreeger nor Kritzer stint on effort. Both of them are having a blast on stage, which helps sell 90 percent of the material. And though we never really care much about what will happen to Monica or Ian, we do care passionately about watching two such talented actors get the chance to strut their stuff for our enjoyment. If only their material were up to their talents.

Rooms, A Rock Romance
Open run. New World Stages, 340 W. 50th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-239-6200; times vary, $10-$69.50.
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