The Lower East Side has always been infested with low life: immigrants right off the boat, vaudeville and the trailer trash of the world. Even now that some of the poor folk have been run off to New Jersey, the good news is some of the investment bankers and yuppies who’ve invaded the neighborhood are now on the bread lines themselves. Oh, to return to the days of Skid Row! I miss flophouses far more than CBGB.

Meanwhile, this past Sunday, the recent Labor Day tradition of the month-long Howl! Festival began with the third annual Low Life party, the kickoff to opening day. Produced by the Jackie Factory, Chi Chi Valenti and her partner in crime Johnny Dynell, this year’s theme was Viper Mad, showcasing the cultural life of the East Village and the Bowery, inspired by early 20thcentury downtown and Harlem hipsters, the opium dens of nearby Chinatown and other local druggies of the past. I was at the event; but try as I might, I couldn’t find any opium anywhere (let alone opium dens).The show was situated on the stage at the southwest corner of Tompkins Square Park, where once upon a time homeless drug addicts used to camp out.

Low Life is a show peopled by the talented but depraved decadent characters of burlesque, drag, performance art and song and dance interpreting the viper songs of Cab Calloway, Fats Waller, et al. The cast this year included Mr. MC Paul Alexander, with special guest Joey Arias, Miss Hattie Hathaway, Sherry Vine, Jonny Porkpie and more. Suggested outfits were those of the New York City demimondaine: Ragtime Rags, Cab Calloway style for butch bitches, corsets, opium den loungewear, Gangs of New York, reefer motifs, First Avenue Flapper, top hats or Bowery Punk. I just threw on some bright colors and a bunch of makeup and hoped for the best.

I asked the dapper MC Paul Alexander what clubs he used to go to. “My first was Xenon,” he remembered wistfully. A partier named Paige, decked out in a forest green velveteen gown, used to work at the notorious World (the current Webster Hall). “You’re bad!” Alexander scolded her. “I had to hold the gun,” she said.