THE BIGGEST FOOD-RELATED uproar in New York this past summer had to be the daring invasion of Manhattan by Canadian donut chain Tim Hortons. NYC residents were taken aback by the almost overnight appearance of multiple maple-leafed breakfast stations throughout the city in July, ramping up fears that our northern borders are not entirely secure. As a tireless Hortons supporter, it warmed my cockles to see Tim flex his sugar n’ coffee muscle through the city that never sleeps. However, I was far more excited to learn a Checkers had quietly snuck its way into Brooklyn a month earlier.

For years, Checkers (or Rally’s, as it’s known in some parts) was the best-kept fast food secret outside the general five boroughs area. Strap-hangers sure looked at this country mouse funny when he spoke of the juicy and flavorful Big Buford burger ($2), the cardiac arrest–inducing Checkers chili dogs ($1.79), the similarly explosive spicy chicken sandwich ($3), and those irrepressible tangy French fries ($1.99; the “Loaded” version with cheese and chili goes for $2.99). Oh, to know what exact combination of spices the grease-soaked overlords use to season those golden brown sticks of dynamite. It really felt like us Outlanders had an edge on all the Gotham junk-food snobs with our black, white and red burger haven.

Now that mysterious artery-clogging magic will become all-too-familiar to New Yorkers; Court Street in Downtown Brooklyn is the latest avenue to boast the greasy delights of the Checkers franchise.

I suppose I wasn’t surprised when I arrived at this brand spankin’ new location to find that it was merely a store front. Indeed, there is precious little real estate in this city zoned for the famous dual drivethru most other Checkers locations boast (this Brooklyn location was one of six “non-traditional” Checkers opened in 2009). Something about the dining experience does seem lost without the nearby sounds of idling engines and disengaged teen employees attempting to communicate via speaker. It’s something of a falsehood, though I will admit the quiet patio nestled far behind the order counter is not without its charm. Sitting amongst such a perfect array of typically New York apartment buildings is almost like being on the set of some cutesy Jennifer Anniston romcom, or the now-defunct King Kong ride at Universal Studios Florida.

Setting issues aside, nothing stopped me from wolfing down my double-patty Big Buford as I always do.What’s good about Checkers is the burgers are about the same circumference as Mickey D’s but at least twice the height.This makes for a filling experience, albeit not too filling— there’s usually plenty of room left for those famous fries.The milkshakes ($1.79) are allegedly, as the kids say, bomb diggy; alas, I have not yet crossed that lactose-based frontier. I have tried Checkers’ chicken wings, though, which come in a variety of flavors ranging from “savory Honey BBQ” to “insanely hot Angry Buffalo” (a 20piece retails for $13.99).While not the absolute best around, I raise my glass of Alka Seltzer to them nonetheless.

One question remains now that Checkers has invaded the city that birthed hiphop: will they dare to bring back their gang-bangin’ feline spokes-puppet Rap Cat (who was part of a somewhat controversial promotion a few years ago in which Checkers encouraged people to fashion their food garbage into makeshift clothing for their own pets)? One can only hope. Perhaps the suits can appeal to the more literary-minded residents of the area and adapt a few Hart Crane poems to put on carry-out bags. “And so I stumble. And the rain continues on this roof. At least I have these bangin’ chicken fingers!” I’m sure that would tickle Paul Giamatti’s funny bone as he went to town on a Checkers Champ, script for Sideways 2: Vineyard Boogaloo in hand.

>Checkers

111 Court St. (betw. State & Schermerhorn Sts.), Brooklyn, 718-797-5333.