"So, I sent him this e-mail and I was like, ‘Is it you?’ And he was like, ‘Yes, it is. Well, guess what? I’m gay!’ I was flabbergasted. I didn’t have a clue."
Now Minck and Kagan are codirectors of the New York City Gay Hockey Association. On a recent evening at the Sky Rink at Chelsea Piers, Minck–wearing the preppie jock uniform of t-shirt and khakis–sat in a small office overlooking the ice. NYCGHA members were out on the ice with teenagers from the Harvey Milk School, teaching them how to skate. Shouts resounded, and bland pop music–Britney, Ricky Martin–piped out over the sound system.
A month after he e-mailed Kagan, Minck played in a gay hockey tournament in Toronto. For the first time, he saw a gay environment that he fit into.
"When I came back," he says, "I was like, I’m gay and I’m proud, and whoever knows it, that’s fine with me."
Minck and Kagan founded the NYCGHA in July 1999. There were about half a dozen guys at their first meeting in the Lesbian & Gay Community Services Center in the West Village.
"I was sure I was the only gay hockey player here," he says of Sky Rink. "I had a completely separate group of friends from the rest of my life, because I was terrified that anyone here would find out I was gay."
Pro hockey hasn’t had its David Kopay moment, at least not yet, and Minck says gays are a long way from a level of acceptance in the NHL.
"There’s one guy," in the NHL, he says. "...[H]e gets traded around a lot. I hear that he’s at the gay bars in Toronto all the time."
What makes his group different from all the straight teams that play at Sky Rink?
"We all go out after the games together. We’re so much more social, we’re chatty, we all know each other...whereas the straight teams, pretty much you come in, get dressed, play hockey, go home after the game. There wasn’t really the camaraderie."
Minck, who works in finance, says that grab-ass stuff, like lingering in the shower after the game and checking out your teammate’s package–all tropes of gay sports-fantasy porn–is much more commonplace in straight locker rooms.
"The straight locker rooms have a lot of homoerotic content in them. Straight guys will, like, comment on each other’s ass or something, totally kidding around. But there’s a lot more grab-ass. Our locker rooms are completely empty of any homoerotic content in terms of anyone saying anything..."
The NYCGHA has two developmental league teams, the Rockets and the Ugly Americans, along with a team that plays in Sky Rink’s Division 6. They also have two travel teams that skate in tournaments as far away as Toronto and Montreal. The association has about 50 active members who fork over the $15 in yearly dues. On Saturday nights, Minck and his fellow players have gone to the Barracuda, a gay bar in Chelsea, to recruit new members, carrying hockey sticks and gear bags into the sleek lounge.
The NYCGHA follows the same rules as the other hockey teams at Sky Rink, including the "no checking" rule–which means you won’t see big, violent, NHL-type hits. Even though he’s had almost no negative reaction at the Sky Rink since he came out, Minck was concerned about virulent homophobia before he started playing.
"I was worried...that the rink would be a particularly good place for some homophobe to, you know, take out my neck, take out my knee. So I was very worried about violence."
Kelly Owen, 37, a Harvey Milk School teacher, entered the office, tottering on skates. He wore loud plaid pants.
"I enjoyed skating, but I didn’t enjoy the whole macho atmosphere..." Owen said about his previous hockey experiences. "This allowed me to discover for the first time that aggressiveness I didn’t have as a kid. Now, I like to–if I can–hurt people."
