Bash Compactor: Summer Vamp

Goddamn Vandamn! For those not in the know, that’s the weekly Sunday night party at the Greenhouse. We’re all getting a bit tired of Susanne Bartsch prancing out on the floor of Vandam dressed like a goddess but acting like a mere mortal, a bitchy one at that. Two new parties to get your freak out are Alannah Starr’s monthly Vamp at Element and Dina Marie Delicious and King Ralphie’s Friday night Breakout at Rush.

Although Vamp promised decadence, I saw mostly debauchery from the surly go-go boys shaking it, outrageous drag queens jumping onto the stage and the usual freaks that make the rounds every night dressed in wacky outfits.

Element is a gorgeous space but, with business sucking these days, the staff should be nicer. “Open up those bags,” the bouncer demanded as though I were a terrorist. Then they wanted me to circle around the velvet ropes rather than just walk in. “Why don’t you strip search me, too?” I asked with my usual disrespect for authority. A rather sedate

Amanda Lepore went through the same thing, pausing only briefly for a photo.

The gang was all there: Kenny Kenny, Jordan Fox, Lady Fag and our lovely hostess, Alannah, pink blush staining a large swathe of cheek. Alannah’s one of the world’s top grossing MTF porn stars but the lady’s not a tramp —she’s famously well mannered. Not so for the statuesque Danni Daniels. The hairdresser-by-day lept onto the stage dressed like a giant ram, horns cascading on his shoulders, black body paint transforming him into a wild creature. Even his naturally pink penis was ebony hued.

The crowd was buzzing about how Alannah’s BMTFF (that’s best male to female friend for you squares) Dina Marie moved her weekly party out of HK Lounge after a well-publicized disagreement with management. She’s moved on and Breakout has invaded Rush, a trendy bar for college boys. “Its a total scene clash,” Herra *C told me. But au contraire, everyone got along well when I was there. There was lots of dirty dancing out on the floor, and a short buxom Latina from Yonkers asked me to cut a rug. “You here to bag a chick?” she asked me hopefully. No, but not a bad idea since my arm candy was dancing with a guy.

At least I was getting some action at Breakout—try being a real live woman at Vamp. My low cut top revealed 36Cs but they couldn’t compete with the 44 DDs surrounding me.

After 1:30 a.m., when things quieted down, I was ready to go. “Leaving so soon?” the formerly rude bouncer asked me wistfully. When times are tough, try a little tenderness.