How to Unhook from Addiction

A new year means new resolutions's here"s how to stick to them By Lorraine Duffy Merkl Welcome to your first week of change. Five days ago, you most likely made a resolution involving one of the big three. With any luck, your agreement with yourself to exercise more, weigh less (always No. 1 on my hit parade) or stop smoking and/or imbibing will last out the week. It"s easy to blame New York City for one"s inability to stay on track's too many restaurants serving too-large portions, not enough time to get to the gym, job too stressful (or no job at all) to go without a cig or drink. But what if you"re a thin non-smoker/drinker who hits the Equinox treadmill at least three times a week, yet still feel stuck in a â??same $?&! different day mindset? First you need to figure out what your (less than obvious) addiction is. According to Unhooked: How to Quit Anything by Dr. Frederick Woolverton, a psychologist and addiction specialist in Greenwich Village, and Susan Shapiro, an author, journalist and professor at NYU and The New School, â??Addiction is a compulsive reliance on any substance or activity that...is used to alternate emotional states that would otherwise feel intolerable if one did not use. Can you not start your morning without a jolt of Joe? Do you check your cell with the frequency and urgency of someone on Obama"s call sheet? Has your workout routine become compulsive (an example of how something healthy can take a turn for the unhealthy)? What gives Unhooked its credibility is that in it, both authors share their personal stories of addiction and how they used the techniques they write about to unhook themselves. Shapiro, a one-time patient of her co-author, admits to being addicted to book deals (aside from this latest one, she"s published five memoirs and two novels in eight years). Before her career could consume her, she cut back on freelance to do charity work. Most the stories, however, are case studies of Woolverton"s very relatable patients. Psychobabble-free, Unhooked offers compassionate and common-sense advice. If you"re trying to drop a few pounds, stay out of the bakery. Want to beat gambling? Stop hanging out with those who are â??in it to win it. Then there"s my favorite: Have a get-away excuse at the ready in case you find yourself in the company of people unsupportive of your new lifestyle choice. Might I add that, for all its major temptations, Manhattan also has a wealth of ways to help yourself: therapists, 12-step programs, hotlines, volunteer opportunities's help yourself by helping others's and classes to redirect your energies, as well as service providers like personal trainers. There are also some things you can do on your own. Switch from coffee to tea; you may meet a handsome Earl Grey-er. Set the alarm on your cell so you only look at it every 15 minutes. And exchange one of those exercise classes for another that lets you pursue a new interest's ceramics, anyone? The book also addresses why people relapse, which boils down to never really getting to the bottom of what hole your habit is trying to fill. Woolverton says that after some success staying clean, people will test themselves, wanting to believe they"re in control and can have â??just one. They would probably have better success passing an exam in high school French. So before you sit down to your nightly, mesmerizing six-hour Facebook routine, decide to make it only three and use the rest of the time to write in a journal, rearrange a closet or read a book (like Unhooked), because nothing will change unless you change something.   Lorraine Duffy Merkl"s debut novel Fat Chick, from The Vineyard Press, is available at amazon.com and barnesandnoble.com.