Bash Compactor: Lust for Must

“You people are my 550 closest friends,” Michael Musto announced to the crowd of partygoers at his 25th anniversary party with the Village Voice at 230 Fifth. “This is an amazing place, like the Starship Enterprise meets the Love Boat,” he quipped, referring to the deluxe venue.

I’ve been to a lot of parties this year, but Musto’s was the best. Do you like free booze, breathtaking views of the Empire State Building, partying outside on a huge rooftop penthouse and incredibly improbable people? Who doesn’t! And the man of the hour? Everyone agreed, he’s a jolly good fellow.

“Joan, can I take your picture?” I asked, fortuitously bumping into Joan Rivers in the lobby as I entered. I snapped four photos so close you could see her pores, a good way to start off the night. I immediately stumbled into performers

The Walkmen play at MOMA.

Little Annie, Kayvon Zand and Jessica Delfino, controversial artist Andres Serrano, Ugly Betty’s Michael Urie, my old dance partner Jonté and Robin Byrd, hostess of the first public access porn show. Every drag queen and party freak in town showed up, from Dirty Martini, Murray Hill, Sultana, Jordan Fox, Ephiphany, Mimi Imfurst, Vanity Society and a Dame Edna impersonator who completely fooled me. Even the legendary Ronnie Spector was there.

Due to heavy-duty congestion from the horde of Musto’s admirers and party-crashers, we wandered up to the rooftop. What a view! And how thoughtful: red robes to stay toasty. “Michael’s really nice but he can be shy,” said artist Daniella La Bocca, Musto’s cousin. It’s true, he can be quiet but he has a wicked sense of humor. “Thanks, Joan, I just got a raise,” he replied to Rivers’ comment about the Voice being smart enough to keep him around for 25 years. “Hey, you must be Gerry Visco!” said a man running over to meet me by the bar. It was Chip Duckett, who organized the night’s festivities. “You’re party central!” he said.Well, that might be true but I sure ain’t Musto.We’re both Italian American, we both wear glasses and we both went to Columbia, but no rumpled sweaters for me. Musto’s done drag a few times for photos and carried it off, but I can say with authority that I’m blonder and I have better legs. Happy anniversary!