Bash Compactor: Thursday Bloody Thursday

With fashion week being such a torturous mess of events, models, fashionistas and pissy attitudes, the best way to end it was with blood—Bloody Mary, that is, the new monthly party Susanne Bartsch and Desi Monster threw at Good Units last week. Everyone and their sister was there in the cavernous, bi-level club. “Susanne looks sexy tonight,” one of my friends said. I loved it—the legendary promoter was turning 59 that weekend and was still smokin’ hot!

At the hopping soiree, I bumped into designer Richie Rich, Nick Zinner of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs and a slew of performers including Amanda Lepore, Joey Arias, Basil Twist, Narcissister, Kembra Pfahler and the DJs Johnny Dynell, Michael Magnan and Will Automagic.

I’ve been at this for a while, so I’ve previously been spewed on by provocative drag queen Rose Wood, but I’m told that on this evening she gave Calvin Klein and his pals a mini-golden shower. And was that Lady Fag wearing a black lampshade on her head? Everyone was dressed to excess—even I was wearing my dashiki bedecked with golden ankhs. Some were costumed as trees, insane McDonald’s drag queen waitresses, astronauts, and yonder, there was Muffinhead, in a blackand-white striped Alice in Wonderland get-up.

“Gerry, finally!” party host and stylist Lindsay Lowe screamed, running over to embrace me. Gothed out with bright scarlet hair, she’s a Facebook friend I’d never met before. She bought me a G&T and I liked her even better.

I moved my headquarters to the gender-neutral bathroom, where I made a big splash shouting at the men at the urinal, “I’m a top! Don’t fuck with me!” Was I tipsy? Who knows, but I transitioned to boasting about my big hair, casting withering glances at the thinning tresses of the bio-males. I’ve always loved socializing in the toilet: the lighting’s great for photo ops.

Alien Nation stood around in their outer space costumes, and soon enough the super-tall convention showed up: performer Machine Dazzle putting on a show in the stalls and extraterrestrial looking artist Markko Donto and model Dylan Monroe posing for photographs in their platform heeled boots. I even played matchmaker, hooking up a newly arrived redhead from England with a cute dude in a top hat. Before I knew it, the lights came on and I clambered upstairs with a trio of trashed trannies showing me their surgery scars, and saw Bartsch herself searching for a cab, light streaking the sky. [Gerry Visco]