"I've learned from this experience that I don't feel comfortable ...

learned from this experience that I don't feel comfortable living in what is essentially someone else's home—even though I'm paying rent. I find myself stepping back from issues I'd ordinarily address. That's okay for a while. But I'm looking for another place—one that will be a sublet instead of a share." -Nina M., 38, graphic designer

LAST NOVEMBER, Nina M. came to New York from San Francisco seeking a six-month-long adventure.

"Things were a little stagnant at home," she says. "It was time to be in a new place. I wanted to find new rhythms in my life—some new ideas, new opportunities and a new perspective. The move wasn't permanent. I planned to return to San Francisco—and to my rent-controlled apartment, which I've sublet for the duration."

That meant Nina had quite specific—and perhaps somewhat unusual—housing needs for her New York stay. As she puts it, she required something that would be flexibly short-term and conveniently located, preferably furnished and within a price range she could afford.

Hotels were out. They were flexible and convenient, but much too expensive. She figured her best bet would be a share. She gave herself exactly five days to find one she could live with.

"I went to Craigslist… I'm sure there are similar services, but Craigslist is one that I knew from San Francisco—because it actually originated right near my apartment there—and I'd already used it to network and advertise," she says. "My trick was to stay on the computer for hours on end, watching as apartments were listed, because otherwise your email to the renter gets lost in the flood of responses to their ad, and you'll never have a chance at the place."

Nina says she preferred a place on the West Side, where she had friends. Other than that, she really didn't know exactly what kind of space and living arrangement she wanted—but after visiting several listings, she quickly learned what she didn't want.

"One ad promised a separate bedroom, but there was actually a makeshift wall dividing the dining room in half. Another had used a bookshelf as a partition. There were tiny rooms without windows. Even worse, there were would-be roommates who had strict rules for everything, including visiting hours for guests and how refrigerator space was to be divided. It was discouraging, to say the least." she says.

On the fifth day, Nina found the perfect place: a spacious room with private bath in a huge apartment on the 15th floor of a residential high-rise on West End Ave. It had a great view and a doorman, which none of the other apartments had had. The rent was $1200 per month, which seemed reasonable—especially compared to other apartments she'd seen.

"I liked the woman who was offering the share," says Nina. "She was friendly. She seemed kind, interesting and generous. She offered unrestricted use of the other rooms, shared her food with me, gave me internet access. She'd furnished my room with antiques and oriental rugs. It was great. All I needed to buy was a waste basket."

Several months after Nina moved in, however, she realized her roommate is "subject to serious mood swings and, as a result, sometimes has huge, unpleasant reactions to relatively small issues—a difference of opinion about a film, for example."

"The conflicts don't last long, but they're discomforting. The rest of the time, she's really quite a lovely person. I just don't have any control over the situation. We haven't discussed my leaving and I still like her, but I don't think I can stay much longer."

This creates a dilemma for Nina, who still needs a temporary home in New York, especially since she's decided to extend her adventure at least through August.

"Aside from my roommate's mood swings, New York is all good. It's raining men. I'm getting great job opportunities. I'm not ready to go home, so I guess I'll go back to Craigslist, but this time I'll try to find a sublet instead of a share."