Labor Day Switcheroo; Al Gore's Tentative Lead

Labor Day Switcheroo; Al Gore's Tentative Lead So everybody's a comedian at the Labor Day break. Frankly, I haven't found much to laugh about in the past week, at least in this year's fifth-dimensional political arena, but as Joe Lieberman is eventually bound to say, Mama said there'd be days like this, there'd be days like this, my Mama said.

But what really got my goat was Collins' unctuous final two lines: "Happy Labor Day weekend. Buy a steelworker a drink." I'd be surprised if Collins actually knows any steelworkers?it's not the 1950s, dear?but this Marie Antoinette tossed-off bon mot, so typical of pampered Times reporters and pundits, just reinforces the Beltway mindset about people who actually work for a living, some with their hands. Yes, Gail, buy a steelworker, plumber, cop or deli clerk a snort of whiskey, and feel empowered that your solidarity with the labor movement is on the record.

What an asshole.

A Sept. 4 Times editorial continues the let-them-eat-pheasant routine. The writer, possibly using a quill pen during these lazy last days of summer, muses about the coming month in grad-school prose that a steelworker, that vital societal ant the Times anachronistically celebrates, would surely choke over. Please read the following poetry: "This is the time we should take off from work?only we never do?to watch summer and fall collide, to feel the sharp nights and the warm days, to walk through a garden that is ripening and dying all at once. In the country, a morning will come soon enough when all the gnats have disappeared, a sign that this short season is over."

Despite the surprisingly perfunctory state-of-the-presidential-race pieces that ran in most daily newspapers last Sunday, solemnly pronouncing that the 2000 Bush-Gore matchup is certain to be the closest in a generation, the news is actually far worse for the well-rested Texan. I give little credence to Newsweek polls?they rely on "registered" voters instead of those who are "likely" to actually turn out Nov. 7, which means a tilt to Democrats?but the troubled weekly (staff morale is low and turnover is high) must be given points for sheer bravado. As the media has explained, ad nauseam, the candidate ahead on Labor Day is almost a lock to win two months hence. Therefore, Newsweek's poll, cleverly released last Friday afternoon, was a sucker punch to Bush partisans: it gave the Veep an astonishing 10-point lead?49 to 39 percent?and dominated the weekend's political coverage.

The bulletin was jarring enough that I turned off my computer and skimmed the new hitjob on the late Richard Nixon?The Arrogance of Power by Anthony Summers?and finished up David Gergen's Eyewitness to Power, a dreadful book filled with happy horseshit about the presidents Gergen shilled for. Summers' allegations of Nixon's wife-beating didn't seem kosher to me?both husband and wife are dead?and while there's plenty to criticize the controversial president for, such as his nutty implementation of wage and price controls, Summers' agenda is as one-sided as a Joe Conason valentine to Bill Clinton.

I suspect the more reliable Gallup poll, probably released within days, will also show Gore in the lead, but by a margin of perhaps five points. Nonetheless, this topsy-turvy presidential contest gets weirder every day. In the space of three weeks the entire dynamic has been altered; the election is no longer Bush's to lose. He's actually going to have to break a sweat and win the damn thing. The internal polls from both camps, my sources say, show encouraging results for Gore, with Bush's once-commanding leads in Democratic strongholds like Minnesota, Oregon and West Virginia up in smoke. That much isn't surprising, but the fact that Florida is actually a competitive state is going to divert time and money for Bush. I find it hard to believe that Gore can clone any more "seniors," the group he's scared silly with his prescription drug demagoguery; and if Gov. Jeb Bush can't deliver the state for his brother it'll be a long winter for the tight-knit clan.

It wasn't reassuring that the GOP nominee was chatting up reporters at his Crawford, TX, residence over the weekend, instead of hitting the road. After a briefing by the CIA, Bush claimed he was itching to go dove hunting. "If I can shoot some dove," he said, "I might decide to have a little dove supper; they're good to eat. I'm not the world's best cook, but I think you can say they're not going to be raw by the time I get through." Swell. While Gore is bragging about doing a Jerry Lewis-style campaign-a-thon, Bush is auditioning for the Food Channel.

But all is not lost. This week is crucial for the Bush-Cheney ticket, and by Sunday afternoon there were signs that the Austin strategists had taken the cold showers they've avoided for at least a month.

Bush finally issued a debate challenge to Gore, eliminating the favored media theme that "lightweight" Georgie is a scaredy-cat when it comes to a one-on-one confrontation with that ferocious forensic champ Gore. Wisely rejecting the Commission on Presidential Debates' schedule, Bush put forth a varied roster: five debates in all, with three presidential confrontations, two of which will be hosted by NBC's Tim Russert (Sept. 12) and CNN's Larry King (Oct. 3) and one that will be a traditional Commission setup (Oct. 17).

Both the Vice President and campaign manager Bill Daley immediately rejected Bush's proposal, but that puts the onus on their ticket: the press will have a tough time arguing that Russert, one of their own, isn't worthy, especially since Bush wants to immediately engage Gore. Bush said on Sunday, realizing that he was finally dominating the news cycle: "My opponent has said he will debate any time, anywhere, and he has already accepted the debates that I am accepting today. It's important for the American people to be able to trust the next president to keep his commitments, and therefore I take Al Gore at his word that he will be there."

In addition, Bush's Larry King choice is bound to be popular with the general public; remember, Clinton and Gore got huge mileage out of appearances on goofball King's show in '92, as did Ross Perot. That Bush capitulated to the standard-NPR type Commission debate at Washington University in St. Louis is a show of good faith.

On Tuesday, Bush is scheduled to detail his own plans for prescription drugs?the issue that Gore has been creaming him on. It's imperative he explain exactly how the Vice President's risky scheme is all populist smoke and mirrors that recalls Hillary Clinton's disastrous healthcare boondoggle that would've controlled one-seventh of the U.S. economy. This speech, as well as the debates, affords Bush a perfect opportunity to tell Americans the truth: that the election of Gore will result in more government regulation and intervention and in the stifling of the entrepreneurship that's kept the economy humming during the 90s. Also, it gives Bush the forum in which to ask why the Clinton-Gore administration, in almost eight years, hasn't accomplished any of the goals that the Democratic candidate is now promising to accomplish.

Bush must seize the Jacksonian strategic ground: he needs to be the cultural populist and position Gore as the cultural elitist that he truly is.

The Vice President's populist scam and bromides against big companies have to be exposed. In last Sunday's Chicago Tribune, Steve Chapman neatly summed up Gore's contradictions: "But it's hard to see what Gore's villains have done to deserve being strung up. When he declares, 'I want to fight for the people, not the powerful,' he neglects to mention that the chief obligation of big corporations is to serve the needs of their customers, most of who are ordinary folks. Faulting their alleged sins without acknowledging their contributions to our welfare and happiness is like visiting the beach and noticing only the sunburns, not the sand or the water... Candidates for high office feel they need enemies to run against. But the ones Gore singles out for abuse do far more good than harm, and if they didn't exist, we would soon miss them. Which is more than you can say for some politicians."

By the way, I give Clinton credit for following the GOP Congress' lead after the '94 elections, as well as heeding Robert Rubin's advice on the economy. Rubin, as I've said, would've been the smarter choice as Gore's runningmate: not only would Gore reap the same political capital for his "groundbreaking" nomination of a Jew, he'd have a man of real substance at his side.

And watch for the Lieberman Backlash. The Connecticut Senator's nonstop comparison of Gore to Moses is revolting, as is his constant sermonizing. That a conservative politician couldn't get away with Lieberman's preaching is obvious?he'd be hounded off the ticket faster than Tom Eagleton. Originally, Gore's veep pick demonstrated a bold stroke few thought he was capable of. (Even more crucial to Gore's surge was his disengagement from Clinton. Gore was stunned at the level of hatred, outside of Hollywood, for the President.)

Also, Joe's Henny Youngman shtick is getting old. When former President Bush referred to Al Gore as the "Ozone Man" in the '92 election, he was widely mocked by the media. Eventually, Joe the Token Jew will not be able to get away with his lame one-liners and his calling Bush an intellectual soulmate of Barney Rubble. That will only energize the GOP base.

The criticism of Lieberman's sanctimony is coming from all sides of the political spectrum. Writing in Slate on Sept. 1, Bruce Gottlieb asked: "Is Lieberman suggesting that no person who lacks faith follows these religious ethical rules? Surely he doesn't believe that. My own dear mother is an agnostic, and she's about as ethical as they come. Does Sen. Lieberman have a problem with my mother?"

And Gersh Kuntzman's column, in the Sept. 4 New York Post, was all over Lieberman's stupid jokes: "'I look at it this way,' said Tom Hertz, co-executive producer of 'Spin City' and a standup comic. 'When Jackie Robinson broke the color barrier in baseball, he was one of the greatest players. So here we are, about to have the first Jew in the White House, but instead of getting the Jackie Robinson of Jews, we got the Choo Choo Coleman of Jews.'"

Aside from that, what's with Lieberman, who made his reputation by blasting Bill Clinton in '98 for his amoral behavior in the White House, now praising the President for his two terms in office? Since being selected as Gore's runningmate, this guy's gone from being a high-priced call girl who'll sacrifice all his principles for political gold to a scag who works the West Side Hwy., a little plump and over the hill. At every campaign stop, Lieberman lays it on thick: noting Clinton's "brilliant leadership," "extraordinary record" and that "There's a lot for the President to be proud of."

Contrary to most journalists, I don't understand what all the fuss is about Bush's advertising rollout last Friday. The ad ridicules Gore for his Buddhist fundraising misadventures, as well as for his penchant for needless exaggeration. This is a "Hail Mary Pass," as Newsweek's Jonathan Alter wrote in the Sept. 11 edition? Please. When it comes to Gore and his cohabitation with Bill Clinton, that ad is just a teaser, and anyone who believes Gore when he says he won't get nasty in the campaign has never heard of James Carville.

Alter, to his credit, finds nothing wrong with negative advertising, writing, in a clear indictment of his hypocritical Beltway/New York colleagues, "What I'm sick of is the pretense that politics should be a tea party." Both Gore and Bush are guilty of nice-guy doubletalk, as they speak of raising the tone of politics and getting rid of Clinton's "politics of personal destruction." As Gore and Bush both proved in the primaries, when they were behind they went down in the gutter. So did Bill Bradley, although much too late. As did John McCain, although his mischief in Michigan and South Carolina is largely forgotten by now.

What I do find disingenuous in Alter's essay is the following paragraph: "And even if the arrogant corner-cutting of the Democrats' 1996 fund-raising blitz is ultimately Gore's responsibility, that hardly makes him a hypocrite for advocating campaign-finance reform now, as [Bush's ad] suggests. Bush, who broke all records for vacuuming up special-interest money and whose campaign-finance reform proposal was labeled a hoax by John McCain, is in no position to lecture anyone about fund-raising."

In fact, Bush, who's made no such high-minded pledges to abridge the First Amendment and limit a person's right to contribute freely to the candidate of his or her choice (as long as it's fully documented), is certainly entitled to blast Gore for his baloney about campaign-finance reform. The Democrats didn't just "cut corners" in '96: they accepted illegal donations from the Chinese (for what favors is still in question), and they sold the White House to the highest bidder. Gore still won't tell the truth about his own culpability in those shenanigans. And let's not forget that Gore, who has ridiculously promised to make the McCain-Feingold legislation his first priority, publicly praised Terry McAuliffe as the world's greatest fundraiser. That he'd wrap his arms around McAuliffe, who's no Boy Scout in financial matters, as the Teamsters well know, and make him chairman of the Democratic convention, is a better indication of how Gore really feels on the issue.

But Bush would be unwise to limit his advertisements to just the "battleground" states and to bashing Gore. I don't suspect he will; look for a mix of his own policies on healthcare, education, Social Security reform, strengthening the military and economic-driven tax cuts, as well as spots rightfully questioning Gore's credibility and honesty.

Gore is cocky right now, which is premature. If Bush really is ready for the eight-week "sprint," maybe these past three weeks will be remembered as just another bump in the road. In last week's "MUGGER," I mentioned that my friend Dan has a Mexican restaurant in Santa Maria, CA. More than two dozen West Coast readers e-mailed for the address, so here it is: Chico's Tecate Grill, 2206 S. Bradley Rd. (in the new Wal-Mart and Home Depot Center), Santa Maria. Phone: 805-925-6199. SEPTEMBER 4 Send comments to [MUG1988@aol.com](mailto:mug1988@aol.com) or fax to 244-9864. Please include your full name, town and state for publication.