where have all the flowers gone?

Ironically, the horrific Times Square traffic tragedy happened just as I began this follow-up column about how a taxi driver’s reported turn on to the crosswalk at York Avenue and 78th Street took the life of store manager Manikkam Srimenan — “Mano.” It must be said again and again, the exceptionally good words and deeds he extended which made him such a beloved community figure — a lifeline, really — and why his so wrongful death got more than the usual media coverage and inspired a standing-room-only memorial service at St. Monica’s Church.

The paper of record’s May 19 front page quite naturally featured a photo story of the Times Square deadly driver action which killed 18-year-old Alyssa Elsman of Michigan and wounded almost two dozen others. Of course, that is tragically newsworthy, unlike the all too commonplace traffic tragedies. Relatively little has been done to stop the number one cause of pedestrian death and injury: a driver’s failure to yield when turning into a crosswalk. You can’t say it enough.

Yes, some intersections are more high-risk than others, but in truth it is every crosswalk where drivers can turn into you — and in broad daylight. (Please be like me, avoiding corners where they can turn into you.) There is data as well as personal experience to support these claims, though Charles Komanoff’s “Killed by Automobile” data and case histories need updating. But unlike drunk driving, failure to yield still gets a relative pass.

I thought of that Pete Seeger song, “Where Have All the Flowers Gone?” and the line, “When will they ever learn?” when I saw the flowers and tributes to Mano were gone from the SuperDel store he managed. It’s not even a month. My son Jeff thought at least a photo of Mano’s should remain in the window. I’m sure the store owner believed it was time. And maybe this time “a little child will lead them.” For example, we learned from Madison Avenue Presbyterian Church deacon Anne Connor’s grandson how a P.S. 158 seventh-grader initiated the storefront’s tribute of flowers and messages and told how the students needed grief counseling. Now Connor thankfully reports the students and their parents will be working with Assemblywoman Rebecca Seawright and Council member Ben Kallos to make failure to yield a priority enforcement and with penalties to fit the crime. (Again, Our Town’s Useful Contacts column lists Kallos and Seawright and other UES contacts.)

Mano’s wrongful death must remind Vision Zero that adult males are the most frequent victims of traffic tragedies. Vision Zero only exists because the rash of child victims caused some devastated parents to channel their grief into a life-saving action. Last week the mayor said at a celebration of “no traffic deaths” at a once deadly corner, “And If you don’t realize the need for these traffic changes, you’ve never lost a daughter or son.” Yes, or a father, mother, spouse, sibling. friend or other beloved person.

We must remember Mano’s goodness of character, his caring for community people of all ages. And if ever there was “service with a smile,” it had to be Mano’s. An example so needed, and especially for kids growing up in a cyberspace culture with too few smiles or real time to help others. Lessons there for faith groups surely — for all of us — everywhere. And oh how we do need a song to remember Mano! dewingbetter@aol.com