Passing the Bar: Brooklyn Winery

Walking in to Williamsburg's Brooklyn Winery, you would be excused for thinking you've tripped into some kind of inter-borough wormhole that has spirited you away to somewhere where old Polish women don't give you the stink eye for talking loudly on the street. Gone is the grit of the surrounding neighborhood, the sort of relaxed, Williamsburg-y atmosphere you might expect or hope for, and of course, any hipness or pretensions thereto. Instead, you'll find a different kind of pretension, the kind that comes with harried waiters in black dress shirts serving bottles of wine with triple-digit prices, and possibly the highest concentration of non-ironic ties in the entire borough.

Seating is commune-style, at long tables of worn, aged wood. The walls are also wood, although of a (literally) slicker and more polished variety, a pleasingly random assortment of dark and light stains. Many tiny lights glitter from the ceiling, competing with the candles along the bar and on the tables. There is a tasting room tucked in the back, which can be reserved for private events. On one night I went, there was just such an event going on, full of suited men with thinning hair just barely managing not to stare down the party dresses of their female companions.

Williamsburg is, in fact, having something of a wine renaissance; Brooklyn Winery is only one of three recently opened playgrounds for amateur oenologists. However, it has a few features that set it apart. First, it is one of a growing number of bars serving wine on tap. Currently, it only offers BKW Imports ($4 for a half pour, $8 for a full, available in Merlot, Sangiovese, Chardonnay), a serviceable if undistinguished local label on tap, although my server informed me that Brooklyn Winery will begin serving its own made-on-site wine on tap some time in 2011. Perhaps the promotional push will begin then.

Brooklyn Winery certainly won't be winning any awards for sustainability. Although the wine selection is constantly changing, on the nights I visited, it was largely a world winemaking tour, including French Chardonnays, German Rieslings, Chilean Cabernets and South African Shirazes. Glasses mostly hover between $8 and $10 for full pours, save for a few pricey options. The 2008 Monestrero Suore Cistercensi S.O. Trappiste Coenobium Vardicchio Blend runs $15 a glass while a bottle of the 2008 Olivier Leflaive chardonnay costs $150. That, too, is an outlier; $30 to $60 is the more typical bottle price.

Brooklyn Winery has one more interesting service on offer: For a rather substantial fee, you can make your own wine, in a very complete sense. From selecting the variety to grow to de-stemming, pressing and casking, you (and your Brooklyn Wineryprovided advisors) will be solely responsible for producing a barrel of wine. It's as close to having your own vineyard as you can get without quitting your job at a hedge fund. Of course, you'll have to keep that job to pay for the service. It costs $5,700 to make a full barrel (that yields 300 bottles), or a relatively cheap $3,550 for a half-barrel (150 bottles). As my girlfriend pointed out, "If you can just find 25 friends to do it with you, it's pretty cheap!" But, as I don't think I've ever had 25 friends, it might be a bit out of my reach.

If wine isn't quite your thing and you still decide to go to a place called Brooklyn Local winos enjoy the goods at Brooklyn Winery.

Winery, there is also beer available in addition to a constantly changing menu of small bites and desserts courtesy of nearby eatery Radish. While it is strictly possible to get yourself and a date in and out of Brooklyn Winery for around $10 (two cheaper halfpours), you would be missing the point. Grab a few glasses, and an overpriced cheese plate, and take a few hours to enjoy a soak up the atmosphere of a fancy alternate universe. You'll be back to getting yelled at by the lady who lives above Enid's soon enough.

-- Brooklyn Winery 213 N. 8th St. (betw. Driggs Ave. & Roebling St.), Brooklyn, 347-763-1506.