Right-Wing Rockers: Finally, a band that speaks to the rest of us.

War isn’t healthy for children and other living things–unless, that is, you’re talking about the brave young men of The Living Things. Their debut EP on the SKG label is a particularly fine tribute to going to war right here, right now. This is even more impressive when you consider that the Berlin brothers–Lillian, Eve and Bosh–are signed to a subsidiary of DreamWorks, which is one of the busiest entertainment organizations currently in the pocket of the Leftist Man.

Lyricist and vocalist Lillian still isn’t afraid to take a strong pro-war stance. In fact, his risk-taking has already paid off with the EP’s title. Typically, Turn in Your Friends & Neighbors would sound like more hyped paranoia over John Ashcroft. My copy, however, arrived the day after al Qaeda kingpin Khalid Sheikh Mohammed was captured by U.S. authorities, and only because he was turned in by–who else?–his friends and neighbors. These Berlin boys are already better pundits than the entire staff of Salon.com.

But the politics only get better once you start listening to the music. The band kicks off with the bold stance of "Bombs Below," a passionate ode to making the enemy kick off while we’re liberating their countrymen from maniacs who’d gas their own people.

Lillian knows that some folks have to be saved from themselves. Accompanied by Steve Albini’s classic production of bitchin’ riff-rock, Lillian sings about how it’s "bombs away" even if we do have to worry about "where the dead boys go."

Besides, Lillian knows where and why the American boys are going. "We’re gonna win the war/That’s what you kids are for/We salute you!" he shouts. It’s a wonderfully heartfelt moment. And if those other dead boys end up in the afterlife with a bunch of virgins, then everyone’s a winner!

Lillian isn’t just war-obsessed, though. The next song, "Pick Out the Meat," takes on drug culture and salutes the individualism that the Living Things embody. This is a song written by a guy who truly knows how confused a person can become under drugs. Lillian even demonstrates by confusing fascists and Christians, not to mention Kennedy and Nixon.

Don’t think those weasels in France are getting off easy, either. "Standard Oil Trust" is an angry diatribe against the evil bastards who’d trade blood for oil. It’s a shame that France is stuck with a president like Jacques Chirac, who proudly supports an oppressive dictator just to maintain France’s 23 percent share of Iraqi oil. "Go to war for the oil!" says Lillian, and he makes perfect sense. It’s time for the agents of democracy to control the crude and put an end to douchebags like Chirac.

Turn in Your Friends & Neighbors, however, isn’t quite a classic. "Bloody Nose" is a pretty lame ending to a powerful set of tunes. Lillian just doesn’t have much to say when he isn’t addressing the big issues. Still, this is an incredible album for these difficult times. Hopefully, the band’s publicity machine will get a copy of this album to our armed forces so they’ll have something new to play besides "Rock the Casbah."

And, yes, it’s a shame that the band was gullible enough to include that made-up Internet quote where Julius Caesar prattles on about "bang[ing] the drums of war in order to whip the citizenry into a patriotic fervor." Who knows why the band even thought that crap was worth including in the CD booklet? Still, at least they weren’t dumb enough to join Barbra Streisand in thinking the speech was from William Shakespeare.