Scissorfight; Franzese's Bully Party; Stony Awards; More Shopping and Fucking

"A 'coydog,' that's different. Coydogs are feral dogs. They have them all over and they hunt in packs. A 'Maine coon cat' is a big ol' cat from Maine. That's different from a 'swamp cat,' which is a mangy, hairy stray that's gone wild. People on vacation buy them as kittens and leave them behind when they grow up."

Ironlung hails from Boston. His band Scissorfight is from New Hampshire; their records, from 1996's Guaranteed Kill up through last year's Mantrapping for Sport and Profit, offer a view of New England as unique and wonderful as Stephen King's or Robert Frost's.

"Yeah, you know, the Yankee Northeast," Ironlung says. "It's gothic. There's an underlying eerieness to everything." There's also a music scene centered in Boston and Portsmouth, NH, that birthed the Queers, Isis and Scissorfight. It wasn't an easy birth.

"Coming out in '94, '95, nobody looked like us," Ironlung says. "We were big hairy guys. Buzzards. That's what a 'buzzard' is, a hairy guy who lives in the woods. But after every show there would be a few people who dug us and they'd say, 'Hey, drop by next week.' We never had problems that way."

These days Scissorfight is the darling of MTV2 VJ Iann Robinson, who interviewed the band for a "You Hear It First" segment in 2001. ("When we went in at Times Square, they directed us to the freight elevator," Ironlung says.) Robinson cited Mantrapping for Sport and Profit as the best record of last year and you know what? He might be right. Scissorfight's mix of heavy riff rock and lyrics about truckers' slang, places to fight, acid, B-movie queens and the snare-making techniques of survivalist Ragnar Benson certainly yields 2001's most fun record. It's impossible to ignore the triumph in cuts like "The Most Dangerous Animal Is Me" or "New Hampshire's All Right If You Like Fighting."

Scissorfight hits Manhattan and Brooklyn this week. Whom can we expect at the show, Ironlung?

"Lots of people who look like Travis Bickle. There'll be some buzzards, too. New York always has fun shows."

Ironlung's bandmates are Geezum H. Crow on guitar, Jarvis on bass and Kevin J. Strongbow on drums. You'll be able to spot Ironlung because he's six foot of man with one foot of black Santa Claus beard.

Scissorfight plays Brownies (169 Ave. A, betw. 10th & 11th Sts., 420-8392) this Thursday at 9:30 p.m.; that show costs $10 and 16-year-olds are admitted. Then on Friday it's Northsix (66 N. 6th St., betw. Kent & Wythe Aves., Williamsburg, 718-599-5103) at 8 p.m. for $10. Cave In and Old Man Gloom are on both bills. Enjoy!

...By the way, how do you think Ironlung got his name? I'll give you a big clue: the third annual High Times Stony Awards come to town this week. The Stonys celebrate counterculture in cinema and?three years after their inception and into year two of the Bush administration?they are a great success. This year's show goes down at B.B. King's with a pre-party, after-party and celebrity guests Snoop Dogg and George Clinton.

It isn't all that shocking. The logical home for the Stony Awards would be Wetlands, but Wetlands closed last fall around 9/11. (This canceled the second annual High Times Doobie Awards, which honor marijuana in music. Those will be back in the fall.) Fortunately, former Wetlands employees migrated to B.B. King's and created a Stony-friendly environment. Once the High Times Cannabis Cup Band played there to a packed house, the stage was set for this week's proceedings.

The Stony Awards now scream of legitimacy: Jim Breuer is hosting; Ethan Hawke is attending and a "Thomas King Forçade Film Achievement Award" has been added to the mix of categories that includes "Best Psychedelic Scene" and "Stoner of the Year." (Thomas King Forçade founded High Times in 1974.) It's not unreasonable to imagine future incarnations of the Stonys challenging MTV's Video Music Awards, which settled last year for Kirsten Dunst and Jimmy Fallon as hosts.

Even more impressive than the Stony Awards' mainstream success is their critical foresight. Bully, the best American movie of 2001, is up for two awards after being dismissed by critics and ignored by the AFI, the Golden Globes and the Oscars. This film may ultimately stand as director Larry Clark's best work (yes, better than Kids); it came and went in summer but is making four times the money in rentals according to distributor Lion's Gate. Here's hoping it brings home Stonys for Bijou Phillips (Best Actress) and Daniel Franzese (Best Psychedelic Scene), whom I got to speak with.

"Oh, that is my scene! I'm nominated? No! Me and Mike Pitt! Oh shit, that's so cool," Daniel says. "I think the whole thing is awesome. I mean, if I had nothing to do with Bully I would have went anyway." Daniel has his own Bully DVD release party set for Thursday at 219 Flamingo (219 2nd Ave., betw. 13th & 14th Sts., 533-2860); that starts at 10 with a $5 cover and $2 vodka drinks. He'll be at the Stony Awards on Sunday, March 3.

A ticket to the Stonys costs $50, but that includes the "Green Carpet" cocktail party (that's the problem with High Times, they always overdo it), the awards show, the hors d'oeuvres, the open bar from 7-10 p.m. and the postshow Cannabis Cup Band performance. Tickets for the event are available at Ticketmaster (307-7171) or the box office at B.B. King Blues Club & Grill (237 W. 42nd St., betw. 7th & 8th Aves., 997-4144). The madness starts at 7.

...As if covering the "Stonys" weren't enough, mainstream newspaper hacks must be crapping their pants over the return of Shopping and Fucking, the play that terrorized them in 1998. They have a few choices on how to print the name: Shopping and F?ing, Shopping and F???, but those are lame. At New York Press we have no such concerns.

Shopping and Fucking premiered in London in 1996. It came across the Atlantic (which should never be referred to as a "pond") in 1998 and is now having its first New York revival. Actor Jay Aubrey, who plays central cokehead Mark, reflects:

"The title certainly helped, especially when the show premiered, to generate some interest, good and bad. I don't know if it would have gotten the notoriety without the title, but there's certainly enough in the play that word of mouth would have gotten around anyway."

Jay Aubrey is not just acting in Shopping and Fucking. He also organized it with his new theater company Effecter Productions, making sure it didn't get mired in the East Village.

"We didn't want to excuse the show by people saying, 'Oh, it's one of those East Village things.' We wanted more of a Chelsea/Village kind of feel," Jay says. The Shopping and Fucking revival premieres this Thursday at Theater 22 (54 W. 22nd St., betw. 5th & 6th Aves., 243-2805) with Off-Broadway favorite Susan O'Connor starring. Showtimes are 8 p.m. and tickets are $15.

Just so you know, the profane title isn't for nothing?this play handles clubbing, larceny, phone sex and snuff films with brutal humor. But like Bully, it stays with you. It also looks like it'll be staying with the theater community for a long time.