STAGE WEDNESDAY 2/26 Cabaret "Close Enough for Love" ...
Cabaret
"Close Enough for Love" Martha Lorin, w/Tedd Firth on piano & Jay Leonhart on bass, proves its all about proximity; Judy's Chelsea, 169 8th Ave. (betw. 18th & 19th Sts.), 212-929-5410; 8:30, $12 min.
The Lounge-O-Leers Ricky Ritzel & Aaron Morishita update the lounge act w/classics like "Stairway to Heaven" & cheesy renditions of Eminem hits; Hannah's Lava Lounge, 923 8th Ave. (betw. 54th & 55th Sts.), 212-974-9087; 5, free [repeats Thurs.].
Comedy
Reverend Jen's Anti-Slam Rev. Jen hosts open mic, seven years strong, where writers, comedians, sketch comics, musicians & freaks do their thang for six minutes; Collective Unconscious, 145 Ludlow St. (betw. Stanton & Rivington Sts.), 212-254-5277; 7:30 sign-up, $3.
Mike Robles Uncensored Emmy Award winning comic from "Loco Comedy Jam" entertains at Carolines on Broadway, 1626 B'way (betw. 49th & 50th Sts.), 212-757-4100; 7:30, $22.50 & 2 drink min. [repeats Thurs., Fri. & Sun. at 8].
Dance
Buglisi/Foreman Dance pres. "Sacred Currents Through Bamboo," a "trans-cultural" project merging the beauty & diversity of East & West; the Joyce Theater, 175 8th Ave. (19th St.), 212-242-0800; 8, $38 [repeats Thurs.-Sat. at 8, Sun. at 7:30, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 2].
"The Main Event" AT&T dance series pres. "Blood Cherries," a solo work by Dawn Akemi Saito inspired by Butoh dance, exploring violence of inheritance & identity; DTW Bessie Schönberg Theater, 219 W. 19th St. (betw. 7th & 8th Ave.), 212-924-0077; 7, $27 [through 3/16].
New York City Ballet continues its winter repertory season feat. Balanchine's "The Steadfast Tin Soldier," & "Who Cares." Plus pieces by Peter Martin & Richard Tanner; New York State Theater, Lincoln Center Plaza, B'way (63rd St.), 212-870-5570; 8, $30-$78 [through 3/2].
THURSDAY 2/27
Cabaret
"Journeys of the Heart" Jan Prokop w/Frank Ponzio on piano; Judy's Chelsea, 169 8th Ave. (betw. 18th & 19th Sts.), 212-929-5410; 8:30, $12 min.
"Omigod-Am I Pregnant by Neal Medlyn" "Physically attractive downtown variety show" feat. Neal Medlyn, his gossip pal Rachel Shukert & LES regular Master Lee, fashion shows, videos & sing-a-longs; HERE, 145 6th Ave. (betw. Spring & Broome Sts.), 212-647-0202; 11, $12.
Comedy
Bruce Bruce Black history month comedy festival pres. hilarious performer; Carolines on Broadway, 1626 B'way (betw. 49th & 50th Sts.), 212-757-4100; 10, $26.50-$30 & 2 drink min. [repeats Fri. & Sat. at 10:30 & 12:30 a.m.].
MC Robert Cohen Talk show host Cohen, aka "the White Oprah," interviews Violet Krumbein; Siberia Bar, 356 W. 40th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 646-674-1710, www.mcrobertcohen.com; 8, $5 don. to medical marijuana research?yeah right!
"Taboo Thursday" Monthly festival feat. rude, crude & politically incorrect new comics; La Scatolina Lounge, 418 6th Ave. (9th St.), 212-473-0555; 10, no cover.
Dance
Life's Tango Tango musical of passion & elegance; Thalia Spanish Theater, 41-17 Greenpoint Ave., Sunnyside, Queens, 718-729-3880, www.thaliatheatre.org; 8, $22-$28 [repeats Fri. at 8, Sat. at 3 & 8, Sun. at 4, through 3/16].
"The Main Event" AT&T dance series pres. Peggy Peloquin in "Strategies Stabilizing" & Amy Sue Rosen/Derek Bernstein Projects in "Break/Broke"; DTW Bessie Schönberg Theater, 219 W. 19th St. (betw. 7th & 8th Ave.), 212-924-0077; 7, $27 [repeats Fri., through 3/9].
"The Main Event" AT&T dance series pres. Sally Silvers & Dancers in "Spaced Out," a flamboyant new work that flirts w/absurdity of the abrupt future; DTW Bessie Schönberg Theater, 219 W. 19th St. (betw. 7th & 8th Aves.), 212-924-0077; 7, $27 [repeats Fri., through 3/16].
FRIDAY 2/28
Cabaret
Castillo Improv Professional psychotherapists conduct live interviews w/audience volunteers whose stories then get played out by the improv troupe; Castillo Theatre, 500 Greenwich St. (betw. Spring & Canal Sts.), 212-941-1234, www.castillo.org; 8, $25-$40 [repeats Sat. 2 & 8, Sun. 2].
"The Immediate Cabaret" One-woman spectacular by Jaclyn Hubberman; HERE, 145 6th Ave. (betw. Spring & Broome Sts.), 212-647-0202; 10:30, $15.
"It's all about love?" John DeMarco w/Daryl Kojak on piano; Judy's Chelsea, 169 8th Ave. (betw. 18th & 19th Sts.), 212-929-5410; 8:30 & 10:30, $12 min.
Comedy
"Above Kleptomania Improv & Sketch Comedy Theatre" Erik Marcisak pres. 108 long-form improv artists, in teams w/names like "Dr. Awesome," "My Kickass Van," "The Team with No Name" & "Your Mom," performing pieces based on audience suggestions; Show World, Theatre #2, 671 8th Ave. (betw. 42nd & 43rd Sts.), 917-214-8252, www.abovekleptomania.com; 8 & 10, $10, $8 st./s.c. [repeats Sat.].
Comedy Line Up feat. Al Lubell of the Letterman Show, Greg Rogell of the Tonight Show, Frank Gia of Comedy Central, Steve Marshall of VH1 & more; New York Comedy Club, 241 E. 24th St. (betw. 2nd & 3rd Aves.), 212-696-5233; 9 & 10 p.m., $10 & 2 drink min [repeats Sat. at 8, 10, 12:30 a.m.].
Eddie Ifft Stand-up w/Sean Conroy, Dean Obeidallah, Jim Norton & Kevin Brennan; Stand-Up New York, 236 W. 78th St. (B'way), 212-595-0850; 8, 10 & 12:15 a.m., $15 & 2 drink min. [repeats Sat.].
"Jonathan Maximus Rockerstern Presents" Eight improv masters create a hilarious musical, w/the help of maestro Hector Coris, based on a title suggested by the audience; Rose's Turn, 55 Grove St. (betw. 7th Ave. & Christopher St.), 212-366-5438; 11, $5 & 1 drink min.
Big Jay Oakerson hosts stand-up feat. Lisa Lampanelli, Tony Rock, Dan Naturman, Ross Bennett & Vinnie Brand; Comic Strip Live, 1568 2nd Ave. (betw. 81st & 82nd Sts.), 212-861-9386; 8:30, 10:30 & 12:30 a.m., $15 & 2 drink min.
Dance
Kara McMahon Cross Dance Co. pres. study of early Apostles' rhythmic patterns in "Rhythms of the Creed" at St. Mark's Church, 131 E. 10th St. (2nd Ave.), 212-674-8194; 8:30, $12, $10 st./s.c. [repeats Sat. & Sun.].
Keigwin + Co. premieres variety of short, contemporary works at Joyce Soho, 155 Mercer St. (betw. Houston & Prince Sts.), 212-431-9233; 8, $15 [repeats Sat. & Sun].
"We Sink As We Run" Evening of dance & theater by Alexandra Beller & Mira Kingsley; Dixon Place at University Settlement Auditorium Theater, 184 Eldridge St. (Rivington St.), 212-219-0736; 8, $15, $12 st./s.c. [repeats Sat. at 8, Sun. at 7, through 3/2].
SATURDAY 3/1
Cabaret
"Anthony, Felicia, Dorothy, David and Me" Judy Kreston & Daivd Lahm bring back their salute to Newley, Sanders, Fields & Lahm; Judy's Chelsea, 169 8th Ave. (betw. 18th & 19th Sts.), 212-929-5410; 8:30, $12 min.
Cary Hoffman performs Frank Sinatra's "most celebrated 50s classics" w/an 11-piece orchestra?and listen, this guy sounds exactly like Frank; Carnegie Club, 156 W. 56th St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-843-8073; 8 & 10, $30 & 2 drink min.
Judy Garland Live! Tommy Femia, as Judy, wows w/perfect renditions of "Stormy Weather" & "By Myself," even performing songs Garland missed out on incl. "Fifty Percent" & "New York, New York"; Don't Tell Mama, 343 W. 46th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-757-0788; 11, $20 & 2 drink min. [through 4/26].
Va Va Voom Room Miss Astrid hosts night of burlesque, vaudeville, strippers, magicians & clowns at Fez/Time Cafe, 380 Lafayette St. (Great Jones St.), 212-330-9349; 10:30, $15 & 2 drink min.
Comedy
Brooklyn Brew-Ha-Ha Find out if there is such a thing as too many comics when Ophira Eisenberg emcees stand-up feat. Jessica Delfino, Girlbomb, Larry Getlen, Val Kappa, Shelagh Ratner, Wendy Spero, Rebecca Tingley, Hank Flynn, Amy Crossfield, Ray Field & Tim Brennan; the Boudoir Bar, East End Ensemble, 273 Smith St. (betw. Sackett & Degraw Sts.), 718-624-8878; 9, $5 & 1 drink min.
Carmen Mofongo's Poquito Adventure, Part I Carmen sets out from the LES on a quest for love & fame, along the way revealing the truth behind her obsession w/pork, twisted family tree & Spanglish cursing; Surf Reality, 172 Allen St. (betw. Rivington & Stanton Sts.), 212-673-4182; 10, $10 incl. one free rum & coke.
"Furnish My Patio" All-improvised evening of family-shattering entertainment; Peoples Improv Theater, 154 W. 29th St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-563-7488; 8, $8.
Kerry McNally hosts stand-up feat. Lenny Marcus, Moody McCarthy, John Bush, Ellen Cleghorn & Joe Vega; Comic Strip Live, 1568 2nd Ave. (betw. 81st & 82nd Sts.), 212-861-9386; 6, 8, 10:15 & 12:30 a.m., $15 & 2 drink min.
Dance
The Broome Corner Studio pres. Valerie Green/Dance Entropy's Identity, which incl. solo "Homeland-Inner Side," based on Yugoslavia's turbulent past decade; the Broome Corner Studio, 425 Bromme St. #4R (Crosby St.), 917-607-0862, 8, $20, $15.
SUNDAY 3/2
Cabaret
"Culture Bandit" Vanessa Hidary's one-woman show mixes poetry & hilarious prose about growing up Jewish in New York's urban landscape; HERE, 145 6th Ave. (betw. Spring & Broome Sts.), 212-647-0202; 7:30, $20.
Jennifer DiLeo w/Fran Minarick on piano at her side; Judy's Chelsea, 169 8th Ave. (betw. 18th & 19th Sts.), 212-929-5410; 8:30, $12 min.
"A Fine Line" Margie Seides w/Paul Trueblood on piano; Judy's Chelsea, 169 8th Ave. (betw. 18th & 19th Sts.), 212-929-5410; 3, $12 min.
Bari Hyman debuts w/David Lahm on piano; Judy's Chelsea, 169 8th Ave. (betw. 18th & 19th Sts.), 212-929-5410; 5:30, $12 min.
"Timeless Divas" Kathy Lee Gifford hosts musical evening feat. over-40 femmes incl. Barbara Brussell, Jamie deRoy, Alix Korey, Judy Kaye, Audrey Lavine, Libra, Melba Moore, Christine Pedi & Karen Saunders?part of proceeds benefits Dress For Success; the Triad, 158 W. 72nd St. (betw. Amsterdam & Columbus Aves.), RSVP 212-615-6966; 7, $25 VIP reserved seating, $20 & $12 min.
Comedy
Tom Soter's Sunday Night Improv See comedy legends mix w/up-&-comers for night of improved skits, games & musical numbers; the Little Theater at the West Side YMCA, 5 W. 63rd St. (Central Park W.), 212-353-7716; 7, $10.
Working My Way Down Penny Arcade's solo show, too cool to be called stand-up, breaks down life's idiosyncrasies incl. "Jenny from the Block"; Fez/Time Cafe, 380 Lafayette St. (Great Jones St.), RSVP 212-462-9077; 8, $15 & 2 drink min.
Dance
Afro Brazil Arts ensemble leads sensuous Samba & demonstrates vivacious Brazilian Capoeira to launch Mardi Gras celebration at Deb.'s Family Disco, in Jack Rose Ballroom, 771 8th Ave. (47th St.), 212-586-7425, 5, $7-$12.
Tiffany Mills Co. performs new, emotionally charged works "Elegy" & "Goetia" set to music by celebrated composer John Zorn; Solomon R. Guggenheim Museum, 1071 5th Ave. (89th St.), 212-260-4699, 8, $18 [repeats Mon.].
MONDAY 3/3
Cabaret
"Have A Little Paris on Me" Former Moulin Rouge performer Debbie de Coudreaux celebrates her debut CD's release at show w/the same name; Danny's Skylight Room, 346 W. 46th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), RSVP 212-265-8133; 9:15, $15 & $10 drink min.
"Jobin, Veloso, Porter & More?" Ruben Flores debuts w/Matt Ward on piano; Judy's Chelsea, 169 8th Ave. (betw. 18th & 19th Sts.), 212-929-5410; 8:30, $12 min.
"Leer Mondays" Lounge-O-Leers Ricky Ritzel & Aaron Morishita rock us weekly w/unique renditions of TLC's "No Scrubs" & Las Ketchups' "Hey Hah,"?no pop hit is safe!; Judy's Chelsea, 169 8th Ave. (betw. 18th & 19th Sts.), 212-929-5410; 10, $12 min.
"Monday Evening Burlesque" Retro cabaret show feat. Julie Atlas Muz; Galapagos, 70 N. 6th St. (betw. Kent & Wythe Aves.), Williamsburg, 718-782-5188; 9:30, free.
Comedy
"Blue Mondays" Tony Woods hosts comedy from the best incl. Todd Lynn, Dean Edwards, Steve Byrne, Kyle Grooms, Dawnel Rawlings & Rondel Hartley; Boston Comedy Club, 82 W. 3rd St. (betw. Thompson & Sullivan Sts.), 212-477-1000; 9:45, $5 & 1 drink min.
Colin Quinn Stand-up w/Elon Gold, Godfrey & Robert Kelly at great comedy venue; Comedy Cellar, 117 MacDougal St. (betw. Bleecker & W. 3rd Sts.), 212-254-3480; 9 & 11, $10 & 2 drink min. [repeats Tues.].
"6:30 Mondays" Greg Contreras hosts stand-up open mic w/fresh new talent working out the kinks in their routines?one drink gets you five glorious minutes on stage; Village Lantern, 167 Bleecker St. (betw. Sullivan & Thompson Sts.), 212-260-7993; 6:30, 1 drink min.
TUESDAY 3/4
Cabaret
"Carol's Cabaret Cavalcade" Evoking Carol Channing, host Richard Skipper pres. music from Dottie Burman, Mychelle Colleary, Sandi Durell, Stefi Sanev, Pam Tate & Paul J. Williams w/Michael Lavine on piano; the Triad, 158 W. 72nd St. (betw. Amsterdam & Columbus Aves.), RSVP 212-787-7921; 9, $20 & 2 drink min.
"Move Over Broadway" Marcus Simeone w/D. Jay Bradley on piano & Marco Brehm on bass; Judy's Chelsea, 169 8th Ave. (betw. 18th & 19th Sts.), 212-929-5410; 8:30, $12 min.
"A Night with Adam Roth & the Jaded Six" Musical comedy show feat. the talents of Joe Vincent, Alec Morton, George Gilmore & C.P. Roth performing original songs & covers in "Stump the Band"?a take off on "Name That Tune"; Arlene Grocery, 95 Stanton St. (betw. Ludlow & Orchard Sts.), 212-358-1663; 9:30, $5.
Comedy
Between A and B: Scenes from our Apartment Performance incl. standup, sketch & improv in a show about life, love & the challenges of living together in a 400 sq. ft. East Village apartment; the Red Room, 85 E. 4th St. (betw. 2nd & 3rd Aves.), 212-206-1515; 8, $15, $10 adv.
Dance
"The Main Event" AT&T dance series pres. Vicky Shick's & Barbara Kilpatrick's "Undoing," work exploring the strain between idiosyncratic & ornate realities; DTW Bessie Schönberg Theater, 219 W. 19th St.(betw. 7th & 8th Aves.), 212-924-0077; 7, $25.
THEATER
Performance times follow the paper's publishing schedule (Weds.-Tues.). We recommend calling theaters to verify.
IN PREVIEWS
Barbra's Wedding Actor Daniel Stern (Breaking Away, Diner, Home Alone, City Slickers) makes his playwrighting debut at Westside Theater, 407 W. 43rd St. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8., mats. Sat. at 2:30, Sun. at 3, $60 [opens 3/5].
Our Lady of 121st Street New play by Stephen Adly Guirgis (directed by heart throb Philip Seymour Hoffman) decamps for off-Broadway; Union Sq. Theater, 100 E. 17th St. (Park Ave. S.), 212-505-0700; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, Sun. at 7, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 3, $30-$65 [opens 3/6].
Polish Joke Comedy dares to ask the question, "Is being Polish a destiny?"; City Center, 131 W. 55th St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-581-1212; Weds.-Sun. & Tues. at 7:30, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 3, $20-$45 [opens 3/18, through 4/20].
Rhapsody in Seth Growing up gay on Long Island; the Actors' Playhouse, 100 7th Ave. (betw. Grove & Bleecker Sts.), 212-239-6200; Thurs. & Fri. at 10, mat. Sat. at 2, $25 [opens 3/11].
Showtune "Celebrating the words and music of Jerry Herman" w/cast of seven at the Theater at St. Peter's Church, 619 Lexington Ave. (54th St.), 212-935-5820; call for times, $65 [opens 2/27, through 3/30].
String Fever New play by Jacquelyn Reingold starring Cynthia Nixon & Evan Handler; Ensemble Studio Theater, 549 W. 52nd St. (betw. 10th & 11th Aves.), 212-206-1515; Weds.-Sun. & Tues. at 8, mat. Sun. at 5, $35 [opens 3/3, through 3/23].
Tea at Five Kate Mulgrew (Star Trek Voyager, Ryan's Hope) portrays Katharine Hepburn in new, biographical play by Matthew Lombardo; Promenade Theatre, B'way (76th St.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 3, $25-$60 [opens 3/9].
RECENTLY OPENED
Adult Entertainment Danny Aiello & Jeannie Berlin star in new Elaine May comedy about porn; Variety Arts Theatre, 110 3rd Ave. (betw. 13th & 14th Sts.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, Sun. at 6, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 2, $25-$65.
Almost Live from the Betty Ford Clinic Michael West's biting one-man show explores the bizarre mental landscapes of more than 20 celebrities; Douglas Fairbanks Theater, 432 W. 42nd St. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-239-6200; Weds. & Thurs. at 8, $20.
At Sea Between the Wars David Gilman (Ghost in the Machine) offers comic take on dreams of a man considering his own death; 345 W. 45th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-206-1515; Weds.-Sat. at 8, $15 [through 3/1].
Ballad of Yachiyo "Story of young Japanese-American girl's sexual awakening & tragic end, set against the back-drop of Hawaii's early 20th-century sugar-cane plantation system"; the Theatre on Two, 432 W. 42nd St., 3rd fl. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-352-3101; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, $15 [through 3/22].
Bartenders "There are 1,259,874 bartenders working in the United States today. This is a story about six of them"; John Houseman Theater, 450 W. 42nd St. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-206-1515; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, Sat. at 5, mat. Sun. at 3.
Betty Rules Musical tracks life of female-fronted rock band; Zipper Theater, 336 W. 37th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-239-6200; call for times & prices.
Buicks Car salesman gets closer to his family via road trip w/"fiesty young Mexican secretary"; McGinn/Cazale Theater, 2162 B'way (betw. 76th & 77th Sts.), 212-206-1515; call for times, $15 [through 3/30].
Call It Peace: Meditations from North America New play written by Anthony P. Pennino inspired by the kidnapping of Daniel Pearl; 13th St. Rep, 50 W. 13th St. (betw. 5th & 6th Aves.), 212-675-6677; Thurs.-Sat. at 7, $10-$15 [through 3/1].
Chemistry Lab "Drama about secret, same-sex relationships between New England high-schoolers in the 70s"; the Workshop Theater Co., 312 W. 36th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-695-4173; call for times, $15 [through 3/15].
Cookin' at the Cookery: The Music & Times of Alberta Hunter Musical traces life of blues singer whose first recorded track, "Down Hearted Blues" (1921), became Bessie Smith's first hit; Theater 3, 311 W. 43rd St., 3rd fl. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-279-4200; Weds.-Sat. at 8, mats. Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $45 [through 3/2].
Erendira Adaptation of Gabriel Garcia Marquez story?"The sad and incredible tale of innocent Erendira and her heartless grandmother"; HERE, 145 6th Ave. (betw. Spring & Dominick Sts.), 212-647-0202; Weds.-Sat. at 8:30, $15 [through 3/15].
The Exonerated Bob Balaban directs Jessica Blank & Erik Jensen's controversial drama based on interviews w/falsely imprisoned death row inmates found innocent & freed; 45 Bleecker St. (Lafayette St.), 212-307-4100; Weds.-Fri. & Tues. at 8, Sat. at 5 & 9, Sun. at 3 & 7, $55.
Far and Wide English language version of Arthur Schnitzler's Das Weite Land at the Mint Theater, 311 W. 43rd St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-315-0231; call for times, $19-$35 [through 3/9].
Fear: An Issues Project Previous Naked Angels Co. "issues projects" incl. censorship, gun control, etc.; Greenwich St. Theater, 547 Greenwich St. (betw. Charlton & Vandam Sts.), 212-206-1515; Thurs.-Sun. at 8, $15 [through 3/2].
The Feast of the Goat Mario Vargas Llosa's play about dictatorship in the Dominican Republic; National Arts Club, 15 Gramercy Park S. (betw. Irving Pl. & 3rd Ave.) 212-362-2560; call for times & prices.
Fifth of July First Lanford Wilson play in Talley Trilogy follows the lives of 60s radicals during two-day reunion, stars Robert Sean Leonard & Parker Posey; Signature Theater Company, 555 W. 42nd St. (betw. 10th & 11th Aves.), 212-244-PLAY; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, mats. Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $55 [through 3/9].
Flower Drum Song Story based on novel by C.Y. Lee about Chinese woman who moves to San Francisco; Virginia Theater, 245 W. 52nd St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $65-$95.
Four Play Four one-acts: Pinter's The Lover, Pillow Talk, After Loyal & Bachelorette at Abingdon Theater, 432 W. 42nd St., 4th fl. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-560-4343; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, mat. Sat. at 2, $15 [through 3/1].
Frederick Douglass Man of letters/former slave's story on stage at church where he worshipped, married & spoke; Mother AME Zion, 140-146 W. 137th St. (Lenox Ave.), 212-307-7171; Weds., Fri. & Sat. 8, mats. Weds., Fri. & Sat. at 3, $35.
The Gun Club Hunt Holman's treatise on teen angst; Cherry Lane Theater, 38 Commerce St. (Bleecker St.), 212-206-1515; Weds. & Thurs. at 7, Fri. & Sat. at 8, mat. Sun. at 3, $15-$19 [through 3/23].
Hairspray Musical based on John Waters' film about plump girl's attempts to racially integrate teen dance show; Neil Simon Theater, 250 W. 52nd St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-307-4100; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $60-$100.
Heartbreak House Typical Shaw, where "romance springs ever eternal but never mutual, and the only stable marriages have the least to do with love." The old rascal works in a few riffs on WWI, as well; Theatre 80, 80 St. Mark's Pl. (betw. 1st & 2nd Aves.), 212-598-9802; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, Tues. at 7, mats. Weds., Sat. & Sun. at 2, $10-$40 [through 4/6].
Hopscotch: the New York Sex Comedy Written & directed by Wendy R. Williams (not to be confused w/the star of Reform School Girls); the Red Room, 85 E. 4th St., 3rd fl. (betw. 2nd Ave. & Bowery), 212-206-1515; Weds. at 8, $15 [through 3/5].
It Just Catches Scenes from Hemingway's short stories set to the music of Cole Porter; Cherry Lane Theater, 38 Commerce St. (Bleecker St.), 212-239-6200; call for times, $55.
Julius Caesar Twenty-fourth season on the theme of betrayal continues at Lucille Lortel Theater, 121 Christopher St. (betw. Hudson & Bleecker Sts.), 212-239-6200; call for times, $55 [through 3/2].
La Boheme Baz Luhrmann (Moulin Rouge, Strictly Ballroom) re-imagines Puccini's opera (w/English supertitles); Broadway Theatre, 1681 B'way (betw. 52nd & 53rd Sts.), 212-239-6200; call for times, $20-$95.
The Last Two Jews of Kabul Comedy based on true story of "last two Jews" in 2001-era Afghanistan who were found holed up in a synagogue?not speaking to each other; La MaMa E.T.C., 74A E. 4th St. (betw. 2nd Ave. & Bowery), 212-475-7710; Thurs.-Sun. at 8, mat. Sun. at 2:30, $15 [through 3/16].
A Life in the Theatre David Mamet's play about two different actors w/two different takes on the profession; Wings Theater, 154 Christopher St. (betw. Greenwich & Washington Sts.), 212-206-1515; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mat. Sun. at 3, $19 [through 3/8].
Ma Rainey's Black Bottom Whoopi Goldberg & Charles S. Dutton star in revival of August Wilson tale about one group's recording session in 1920s-era Chicago; Royale Theater, 242 W. 45th St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. at 8, Tues. at 7, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $50-$80 [through 6/29].
Mandatory Field Trip "An evening of short plays, stop-motion animation & the chance to win a mohair thong"; Manhattan Theater Source, 177 MacDougal St. (8th St.), 212-501-4751; Weds.-Sat. at 8, $15 [through 3/1].
MetLife Foundation Play Writing Competition Free reading of the finalists; Gramercy Arts Theater, 138 E. 27th St. (betw. Lexington & 3rd Aves.), 212-889-2850; Tues. at 7 [through 3/25].
Mrs. Warren's Profession George Bernard Shaw captures battle between youth & experience at Looking Glass Theater, 422 W. 57th St. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-307-9467; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, Sun. at 5, mat. Weds. at 2, $12-$15 [through 3/16].
Nobody Knows I'm a Dog The anonymity of the internet allows six characters to lose themselves in wishful personas & fictional lives, until reality returns w/a vengeance; the Red Room, 85 E. 4th St., 3rd fl. (betw. 2nd Ave. & Bowery), 212-457-5498; Sun. at 8, $15.
Radiant Baby New musical based on life of pop artist Keith Haring at the Public Theater, 425 Lafayette St. (Astor Pl.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds., Sat. & Sun. at 2, call for prices.
Requiem for William Based on the plays of Jack Cummings III; Connelly Theater, 220 E. 4th St. (betw. Aves. A & B), 212-206-1515; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, mat. Sun. at 3, $15-$50 [through 3/2].
Say Goodnight Gracie Frank Gorshin plays George Burns, taking you on a guided tour of the famed performer's life incl. his unlikely marriage to Gracie Allen (the words "Together Again" are now engraved on she & George's headstone); Helen Hayes Theatre, 240 W. 44th St. (betw. 7th & 8th Aves.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Mon. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $65-$70.
The Seagull Still Chekhov, though not the same?this being the "laugh-out-loud, Americanized version"; Trilogy Theater, 341 W. 44th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-206-1515; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, mat. Sun. at 3, $18.50.
Sleeping with Straight Men Based on true story, gay man admits to crushing on hetero during national talk show & is subsequently killed (starring Mink Stole); Maverick Theater, 307 W. 26th St. (8th Ave.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Fri. & Tues. at 8, Sat. at 7 & 10, Sun. at 7, mat. Sun. at 3, $35-$45.
Three Women in Indecision Couple of gals who've forgotten, despite trashy reality shows, that this remains greatest country on earth work out their angst; West Side Dance Project, 357 W. 36th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-330-7120; Weds.-Sat. at 8, $15 [through 3/1].
Twelfth Night/Uncle Vanya Sam Mendes (director of American Beauty & stage production of Cabaret) pres. new renditions of Shakespeare & Chekhov, performed by London's Donmar Warehouse (cast incl. Emily Watson); BAM's Harvey Theater, 651 Fulton St. (betw. Rockwell & Ashland Pls.), Ft. Greene, 718-636-4100 for sched.; $30-$75 [through 3/9].
The Two Gentlemen of Verona Shakespeare at Theater Ten Ten, 1010 Park Ave. (85th St.), 212-288-3246 x3; call for times, $19 [through 3/23].
Veins and Thumbtacks Jimmy Bonaparte is pissed & he proves it at the Producer's Club, 358 W. 44th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-712-7922; Weds.-Sat., Mon. & Tues. at 8, mat. Sat. at 3, call for prices.
Who Killed Woody Allen? Apparently this play as a certain control freak's panties in a bunch. It resumes at the Triad Theatre, 158 W. 72nd St. (betw. Amsterdam & Columbus Aves.), 212-352-3101; Thurs. & Fri. at 9, $15 [through 3/7].
Worm Day "A transforming encounter with an earthworm and the magic of public radio" (?) force two bibliophiles together at DR2 Theater, 103 E. 15th St. (betw. Park Ave. S. & Irving Pl.), 212-505-0858; call for times, $15 [through 3/9].