The Intersection: Fire Breather

He set himself on fire several times, waving his hand and swearing. He walked around in tight circles in that way people do when they're waiting for the pain of a recent injury to wear off. It was like a carnival sideshow act or something you'd see a street performer in Amsterdam attempt. Not necessarily what you'd expect the waiter at a bar to try. Holding a lowball glass in one hand, he dipped his fingers into a dangerous mixture of alcoholic beverages, wiping his mouth and goatee with the potent concoction. Then he filled his mouth with what remained in the glass. After setting his fingers on fire, the waiter raised his hand to his mouth and blew alcohol into the fire, creating a blazing plume of flames that stretched out three feet in front of him.

Later, he explained that the trick was something he'd learned while he was in the Navy. Apparently being in the Navy is a hazardous occupation for a variety of reasons. "Once my uniform caught on fire and I had to jump in the bilge," he reflected. But the trick had some bad side effects. He burned off portions of his goatee and sent pellets of spit into the crowds of people he meant to entertain.

His act was compelling, though. Compelling enough to distract attention from the slick, busty waitress who was advertising her new drink special, Lick Me Till I Come. She wandered from table to table with a bottle and several tiny plastic cups.

Meanwhile, the fire-breathing waiter continued to burn his fingers and send torrents of alcohol spittle into the faces of his audience. The waitress would have done better had she sold napkins.